State of Emergency!
by Kamkats
Summary: The boys at Station 51 have a very special guest drop in.. can Roy and Johnny survive with Gordon Shumway ?


Some characters you might see in this text

GORDON SHUMWAY (A.K.A., A.L.F.)- A wise-cracking alien from the planet Melmac.

JOHN "JOHNNY" RODERICK GAGE-A young fireman/paramedic in his mid-twenties.

ROY DESOTO- A calm, experienced, fireman/paramedic in his early thirties.

DR. KELLY BRACKETT-Handsome, serious-minded doctor who is the leading heart-surgeon at Rampart General Hospital.

NURSE DIXIE MCCALL-Head nurse in the ER at Rampart General Hospital.

CAPTAIN HENRY "HANK" STANLEY-A strict, but not cold fire captain in his late thirties.

CHESTER "CHET" KELLY-Prank-playing fireman who works at Station 51.

DR. JOE EARLY-A kind, gray-haired doctor who works at Rampart General Hospital.

OFFICER JAMES A. REED-Dashing young policeman in his early twenties.

OFFICER PETER J. MALLOY-Experienced, uptight police officer in his late thirties.

MARTY MCFLY-Confused youngster with a time-traveling DeLorean.

CAPTAIN JOSH EVRETT-Troubled and divorced young fire captain who lives alone.

ROPEY CARSON-An Italian-born cowboy who is in such a mental state, that he believes that he's in the late 1800's.

PINT-SIZE TUHHURN-Ropey's best friend, who also believes that he's in the late 1800's.

DONNA LANE-A beautiful young woman in her mid-twenties, who works for the DAP.

JACK BLAKE-A surly young man in his thirties, who also works for the DAP.

WILLIE TANNER-A middle-aged un-authoritative father who despises Alf.

KATE TANNER-Wife to Willie Tanner and mother to Lynn and Brian. Not patient with Alf.

LYNN TANNER-Kate and Willie's tall, eighteen year-old daughter who feels sorry for Alf.

BRIAN TANNER-Lynn's eight-year old brother who is friend to Alf and can't live without him.

MEREDITH GRISWOLD-Johnny's annoying and nosey next-door neighbor.

JASON CHANNING-Cheery fireman/paramedic with a heavy English accent.

"Is it safe?" Fireman/paramedic Roy DeSoto asked his paramedic partner, Johnny Roderick Gage, who was poking his head around the side of the squad car.

"I dunno." he murmured in response.

Roy struggled to hold the black body bag, which was squirming in his arms.

"Stop wiggling!" Roy spat at the body bag.

The person inside did not comply.

"Let me out! You're violating my alien rights!" the voice decreed.

Johnny whipped around and scowled at Roy.

"Shut him up, will you?" he snapped ungraciously, still trying to see if it was safe to move from their spot in the fire station garage. After the fighting between Roy and the body bag had settled down, Johnny motioned with his hand for Roy to come forward. The two scuttled towards the squad car's storage compartments. Johnny flew the doors open and vigorously gestured for Roy to shove the body in. Roy tossed the black body bag in the storage compartment and slammed the doors, ignoring the muffled protests coming from the squirming body.

Johnny leaned up against the squad car, relaxing his tensed shoulders.

"Thank goodness that's over." he sighed in relief.

Roy looked unsure. He looked back and forth to make sure no other firemen were around.

"Now what?" he hissed, trying to keep his voice down to a whisper.

"What do you mean, 'now what?'" his partner demanded. Roy shook his head and muttered something under his breath, not hiding the fact that he was very flustered.

"We can't keep him in there forever!" he whispered urgently.

"Why not?" Johnny snorted with a one-sided grin.

Roy narrowed his eyes and frowned. "He'll scream or do something and then our secret will be found out!" he explained. Johnny's eyes bolted wide open.

"What?" he demanded, "_Our _secret? This is your problem, not mine!" he said, trying to unjustly sic his problem on someone else. Roy huffed and gritted his teeth.

"You also know that it's a crime to shelter an illegal alien!" Johnny accused. Roy went slack-jawed and stammered for words.

"I wasn't the one who found him in _your _locker eating _your _cookies!" Roy shot back. That was an outright lie, but what else could be said in a moment of hot anger?

"Yes you were!" Johnny contradicted. Roy gave him a nasty look and

Johnny covered his eyes with his hands and sighed. This was going to be a lot harder than he thought. This was the last thing he wanted to do on a Monday. Mondays were already hard enough as it was, not counting the fact that he and his partner were hiding an illegal alien in that very station, Station Fifty-one. Roy glared at Johnny with cold contempt, trying to bite back some snappy remarks. Johnny sighed again and crossed his arms.

"I've got an idea." he started. Roy rolled his eyes. "I was afraid of that." he muttered.

Johnny was about to insult him, but didn't have the chance; his partner cut him off.

"Whenever you get an idea, it's like 'Watch out!' I mean, really! You could be put in the failures national hall of fame!" Roy said, raising his voice. Johnny slammed his fist up against the squad car, unaware that he had slightly dented it.

"Would you just bloody listen to me? We've got to get that thing out of here before the cap finds out! If he does, he'll call the cops and then other people will find out and there'll be mass chaos!" he exclaimed.

"That _thing _is a creepy, furry, three-foot-tall eating machine!" Roy yelled.

"All the more reason we should get him out of here! How about you hide him at your house?" Johnny suggested coolly. Roy snapped his glare back at Johnny with an expression of outrage.

"No way! You can skin me alive and drench me in boiling oil, but I will _not_,I repeat, _not_, have that creature in my house!" Roy shouted. Fire Captain Henry "Hank" Stanley poked his head out of his office and frowned.

"What the hell is all the yelling about?" he demanded.

Johnny and Roy pressed their backs up against the squad car's compartment doors and smiled.

"Oh, nothing!" Roy replied quickly, almost giving way to suspicions. Johnny nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, Roy and I just had a little disagreement. That's all." he explained.

Captain Stanley didn't believe them one bit, but he wasn't in the mood for finding out what the problem was.

"Well, keep it down," he warned, "I was trying to decide on which colors I should order the new fire coats in, which, incidentally, didn't require a darned wake up call!" with that, he slammed his office door shut.

"Nice going, partner." Johnny sneered. Roy ignored him and opened up the storage compartment. He grabbed the body bag and headed out to the parking lot in the back of the fire station. Johnny raced after him and tried to get in front him, but Roy walked around him and pretended he didn't notice.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Johnny asked.

Roy didn't stop walking until he had reached Johnny's 72' Plymouth Barracuda and had pulled open the passenger's side door. He threw the bag in the passenger's seat with a smile of triumph.

"He's _your _problem now!" Roy said. He then stormed off, mumbling things as he went.

Johnny scowled at his paramedic partner and yanked out the body bag. He dropped it roughly on the pavement and kicked it.

The person inside unzipped the bag and poked their head out. In fact, it wasn't a person at all! It was a furry, brown, three-foot alien from the planet Melmac. He rubbed his elongated snout and looked up at Johnny.

"Son of gun, man! You didn't have to drop me like a sack of potatoes." the alien complained, narrowing his tiny black eyes at the ticked-off paramedic.

"I suppose I shouldn'ta kicked you either?" Johnny said sarcastically.

The alien got up out of the bag and climbed into Johnny's car.

"Hey! Sweet ride, man!" he exclaimed as he sat in the driver's seat and pretended to race the car. Johnny flung open the driver's side door and shoved the alien away.

"Alf, stop it!" he commanded.

Alf shrugged and raised his ears.

"Well, la-ti-da! Why didn't you just say so?"

Johnny sat down in his car and slammed the door shut. He then rested his forehead on the steering wheel and looked like he was going to cry. How did he get himself into this mess? What a disaster!

He flashed back to Sunday and remembered Roy opening up his locker to take back a shirt Johnny had borrowed, when he saw a furry alien fall out. After both paramedics had suffered a few fainting spells and moments of lost speech, everything seemed _almost_ normal. Johnny had learned that the alien's name was Gordon Shumway and he had come from the planet Melmac. But, everybody called him A.L.F., for the letters in that particular name stood for Alien Life Form. Alf had settled on Earth with a small human family called the Tanners. Johnny had found out that the Tanners lived somewhere in Los Angeles, but their exact whereabouts were unknown. Alf had left his loving family when he heard a conversation between the mother and the father of the family. They were talking about what life would be like without their alien friend and how everything was so much better before Alf had come into their lives. Alf, his feelings being hurt, left the Tanner residence in search of a new home. He had traveled, unseen, through L.A. and had ended up somewhere in a low-income area. After believing he would starve, he wandered around aimlessly for hours, when he smelled the sweet fragrance of chocolate chip cookies. Unaware that the smell was coming from a nearby fire station, Alf followed the smell with what strength he had left. Finding the source of the sweet smell in a locker inside the fire station, Alf had closed himself in Johnny's locker and had begun to chow down on a box of chocolate chip cookies. He had only finished three quarters of the box when he was discovered by an unsuspecting paramedic, Roy DeSoto. So, Alf's journey had come to an end, as the alien himself believed. But Johnny Gage had other plans. There was no way he was going to have an extraterrestrial in his house, whether or not they were lonely.

"So, are we going by your place?" Alf asked, "I'm still hungry. I have eight stomachs you know. That's a lot of empty chambers to fill!" the alien persisted.

Johnny bolted his head up from the steering wheel and gave Alf a look of shock.

"You have _eight stomachs?_" he choked out in disbelief.

Alf nodded.

"Yeah, don't _you_?" he asked, cocking his head.

Johnny shook his head.

"Heck, no." he replied, thoughts of having eight stomachs rushing through his mind. He pushed the thoughts away and looked at the stubby alien.

He held Alf's gaze steadily, trying to think of what he was going to do next. His shift was going to end in an hour, so maybe he _could _figure out someway to smuggle Alf into his house.

Alf opened up the glove box and pulled out a few photographs.

He perked his ears up at them and quickly brushed through them.

"Oh, mama!" he exclaimed, "Who's that chick?" he asked, closely examining one of the photos. Johnny snatched the photographs away from Alf and shoved them back in the glove compartment. He slammed it shut, but it popped open again. He slammed it shut and once more, it fell open. This persisted for about ten seconds, when one last slam ended the battle.

Johnny huffed and rested his arms on the steering wheel. So far, this day had not gotten off to a good start. The two sat in the car until Johnny's shift had ended. It had been a slow but rough day. Johnny quickly made his way home, but not before making sure that Alf had buckled his seat belt. Johnny was silently thanking God that the firemen hadn't gotten any calls that morning, for the thought of leaving Alf unattended, sent chills down his spine.

It was dark when Johnny pulled up in the driveway of his small house. The street was tree-lined and looked like a part of a small town rather than a part of L.A. Alf was about to climb out of the car, but Johnny yanked him away from the door handle. He grabbed the sun-shade from the ceiling and bent it over the passenger's side window.

"Keep down! If my nosey neighbor Ms. Griswold sees you, she'll have a cow!" Johnny whispered. Alf shook his head in pity.

"You humans never fail to psych me everyday of my life. Today I learned that humans can give birth to cows!" Alf exclaimed.

"Shut up! Stop goofing around!" Johnny snapped at him. When Alf gave him a serious look of doubt, the paramedic had to explain further.

"I am serious about this lady. You can't even sneeze without her knowing! She never used to be like that, trust me. It all started after her husband died in a house fire three years ago. I can't imagine what her reaction is going to be when she sees me sneaking a full body bag into my house!" Alf shrugged as he picked up the body bag off the car floor. He slipped into it and started zipping it up.

"How about we switch places? I go into the body bag and you carry me in?" he suggested. Johnny widened his eyes.

"That was the original plan!" he said.

Alf raised his eyebrows. "Was it now?" he asked before zipping the bag up all the way. Johnny looked through the passenger's side to window to catch a glimpse of Ms. Griswold's house. No lights were on; but that didn't guarantee she wasn't watching him. He took in a deep breath and got out of the car with the heavy body bag. He was in the process of walking up his front steps with it, when he heard a scorning voice behind him.

"_Mr. Gage!_" the accusation was spat out. Johnny turned around with an expression as though he had stepped on a really sharp nail. There at the bottom of his front steps, stood Ms. Griswold, crossing her arms. She was wearing her hair curlers and was in her bathrobe and bunny slippers.

"What have I told you about parking your fancy-shmancy sports car all crooked like that? It makes this neighborhood look like a mad drunk lives here!" she scorned.

Her wrinkled face was even more unflattering now, with her eyebrows creased in an unforgiving scowl.

_ Yes mother! _Johnny thought to himself. With an overly sweet smile, he kindly acknowledged his nosey neighbor.

"I'm terribly sorry, Ms. Griswold," he apologized, every word being dragged out of him. "I'll make sure to reposition it in the morning. I was just in a hurry to get to bed."

Ms. Griswold grunted in response. Just as Johnny was turning around to finish walking up the steps, she pressed him with a suspicious question.

"Another thing," she started, her voice sounding very authoritative, "I don't mean to pry, but…what's that you're carrying?"

Johnny went slack-jawed and darted his eyes back in forth, frantically trying to think of a logical response.

"It's uh…my guitar case! That's it! It's my guitar case!" he replied.

Ms. Griswold looked unconvinced.

"What's _in_ the case?" she questioned.

Johnny wanted to roll his eyes, but he didn't want to be disrespectful.

"A guitar." he said curtly.

Ms. Griswold raised an eyebrow, her arms still crossed. "Finally decided to take up music, I see. At least you've shown me you're not _entirely_ uncultured."

With that, she turned on her heel and trudged back to her house.

Johnny made sure she was in her house before he ran through his front door. When he was in, he slammed the door behind him and leaned up against it. When he had recovered from his shock and his hands stopped shaking, he put the body bag down and quickly unzipped it. Alf sat up and coughed.

"I thought I was going to run out of air!" he choked.

Johnny helped Alf stand up and then folded up the body bag. He pulled back the curtain from his living room window with one finger, making sure that there was no sign of his annoying neighbor.

"Hey! You didn't tell me you had a really big casserole dish!" Alf called from the kitchen. Johnny widened his eyes and ran into the kitchen he skidded to a halt when he saw Alf preheating the oven.

"What hell are you doing?" Johnny demanded. Alf got down off the stool he was sitting on to lean over and preheat the oven. He grabbed the stool once he was off of it and put it back where it was. Johnny frowned and followed Alf.

"I asked you a question!" he insisted.

Alf got down on his hands and knees and started looking under the table in the dining room. He continued to ignore Johnny's requests.

"You have cat toys on your floor." Alf observed quietly.

Johnny crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow, giving Alf a dubious look. "Yes, well…I own two cats." he muttered. Alf perked his ears up and rubbed his furry paws together.

"Are they here? Right now?" he asked, excitement bubbling up inside of him.

Johnny gave a noncommittal grunt and sat down at the dining room table.

"Yeah. They're around somewhere. Probably upstairs, on my bed. That's where they usually are." he said, taking no notice of Alf quickly scurrying through the living room, towards the staircase. Johnny tilted his head to see where Alf was going. "Alf?" he called. When the alien didn't respond, Johnny quickly got up out of his chair and ran up his stairs. He was bowled over by a blur of light brown fur and fell back down the stairs. "What the…?" he trailed off, looking around to see what had run him over. He heard some excited giggling in the kitchen and instantly got up.

"Alf? Was that you?" Johnny called. He walked into the kitchen and gasped.

There, on the kitchen floor, was Alf, kneeling down and trying to get two tabby cats to sit in a glass casserole dish. Johnny was too shocked to move. Did this alien _eat _cats? Alf quickly picked up the casserole dish and waddled over to the oven. He shoved the glass dish onto the bottom rack and quickly slammed the oven door. Johnny lunged forward and knocked Alf over. He opened up the oven door, only to have the two tabby cats jump forward and claw him. Once he managed to pry the writhing, screeching mass of fur off his face, he sat up and gave Alf a look of hatred.

"What did you think you were doing?" he asked, getting to his feet and clenching his fists. The temptation to strangle Alf was overwhelming his senses. Surely no one would hear a muffled scream in the night? It would be over with quick. A twist of the head and the snap of bone would be all he needed. Johnny shook his head to clear it of such awful thoughts.

"I was making supper!" Alf said. He was honestly unaware that he had done anything wrong.

"_Supper?_" Johnny shouted, "You were putting my cats in a casserole dish!"

Alf looked infuriated. "Well, sorry to pop your dome of polluted air, but they wouldn't fit in the toaster! I bet you're one of those hippies who don't take baths and only buy bagels for they're stupid bagel toasters! How do you expect me to fit a cat in a bagel toaster? I can't do everything you know!" he snapped back at the angry paramedic.

Johnny was utterly taken aback by Alf's outlandish explanation and reached down to grasp the alien. He grabbed a wad full of the furry creature's chest fur and pulled him close to yell at him.

To his surprise, Alf yelped and jumped back, clutching his chest.

"Pervert!" he screeched. He then pretended to pick up an invisible skirt and ran up the stairs. Johnny stood up straight and screwed up his nose. This alien also had a sense of humor. He relaxed a little and let all his thoughts of murdering the alien drain away. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad, living with Alf, once he had trained him not to eat the cats. Perhaps Alf would get sick of him and go live with somebody else. Yes…that would be nice. It wasn't like he was staying with him forever. Johnny then thought, _I least I hope not._

The next day, the sun was out and there wasn't a cloud in sight_. _Johnny was lying face down in his pillow and had neglected to set his alarm clock. He had slept until noon when he opened his eyes and noticed sunlight streaming through his blinds and sending blurred stripes across his bedroom walls. Johnny lifted his hand out the tangled mass of blankets and reached for the alarm clock on his nightstand. He blinked the sleep out of his eyes and glanced at the blurry numbers on his digital clock. _Noon? _He had slept in way too late. He had things to do and places to be. This was not good. Johnny quickly sat up in bed and rubbed his eyes. He jumped out of bed, but fell flat on the floor, taking the blankets with him. He heard a muffled "Oof!" as something heavy landed on top of him. Johnny got out from underneath the heavy weight and tore the blankets off of whatever it was. He gasped and almost screamed when he saw who it was.

"What the heck were you doing in my bed?" Johnny demanded, looking down at a sleepy-eyed Alf. Alf looked up at him and yawned.

"Sleeping in the laundry basket just wasn't doing it for me." he said through another yawn. Johnny was outraged that an _alien_ had slept with him. The thought sent shivers down his spine. At least this alien wasn't slimy. _That _would have been creepy enough to send him into cardiac arrest. Johnny sighed, exasperated. "From now on, you'll sleep in the _guest_ laundry basket. They one filled with clean sheets."

Alf rubbed his paws together. "Ooo! Guest! Now I feel special!" he crooned. Johnny shook his head and started downstairs. Alf followed him, wondering what they would be having for breakfast. Fried cats? Cat flambé? Boiled cats with a side of carrots? The list of things you could do with cats was so diverse! This was going to be one memorable breakfast, or so Alf thought.

When Johnny got downstairs, he headed for the kitchen and pulled out a box of cereal from the cabinet above the stove. He grabbed two bowls and unceremoniously dropped them on the kitchen table and then tossed a couple of spoons next to them. He looked in the refrigerator for some milk and did not succeed. "Ah, dang it!" he sighed, "We're all out of milk." with that, he slammed the fridge shut and grabbed the cereal bowls. After Johnny poured the raisin bran in them, he ran the bowls under the tap, filling them with cold water. Alf was very mystified by this strange behavior and watched intently. Johnny put the bowls back down on the table and started to eat. Alf looked down at the soggy cereal and then looked up at the grumpy fireman. Johnny cast a glance at Alf when he didn't hear him crunching on the cereal.

"Well?" he asked.

Alf looked down at the cereal again and then back up. "'Well' what?" he asked.

"Aren't you going to eat?" Johnny questioned.

Alf cocked his head. "Eat what?" he asked, utterly confused. Johnny blinked several times, just as confused as Alf. "The cereal I put in your bowl." he prompted. Alf looked disappointed.

"But, this doesn't look like food." he replied. Johnny just continued eating.

"It's better than nothing." he said through a mouthful of raisin bran. A look of disgust passed over Alf's face. "I thought we were having cats for breakfast." he said quietly. Johnny froze halfway in between taking another bite of raisin bran and just dropped his spoon in his bowl. He then sat back in his chair and sighed.

"Alf, if you're going to live here, you're going to have to learn that you can't eat cats." the paramedic said firmly. Alf pushed the bowl of cereal aside. "Why not?" he demanded.

Johnny suddenly got flustered. He leaned back towards the table to try to explain to Alf about human customs. "Alf, there are certain things in life that you do and you just don't ask why!" he explained, vigorously gesturing his hands in his frustration. Alf didn't look appeased.

"Like, _why _can't I eat cats?" he questioned in a mocking tone. Johnny rolled his eyes and snapped his gaze away from Alf. He then regained his confidence and stood up straight.

"Because if you do eat cats you will burn in Hell, and I will see to that personally." he said, thinking himself very clever. Alf narrowed his eyes. "Last I checked, the Ten Commandments didn't include, 'thou shall not eat cats!'" he countered. Johnny dropped his mouth open and then gave Alf an even deeper scowl.

"Maybe 'thou shall not eat cats' falls under 'thou shall not _kill_!" he shouted, clenching the edges of the table and shoving his face closer to Alf's, hoping he might intimidate the alien. Alf stood his ground and held the fireman's stare with an unwavering glare. "I'm sure you'd know a lot about that." Alf sniffed, remembering the look in Johnny's eyes after Alf had shoved the cats in the oven. Johnny was taken aback by Alf's insult and tried to think of a snappy comeback. He was about to say something about Alf's ridiculous looking snout, when the doorbell rang. Johnny whipped his head around, looking at the front door. He quickly motioned with his hands for Alf to get down.

"Get under the table!" he hissed while gritting his teeth. Alf was no stranger to hiding under the kitchen table. He had gotten a lot of that back when he lived with the Tanners. Alf stooped under the tablecloth with a half-hearted sigh and kept his mouth shut. Johnny ran up to the front door when he heard the doorbell ring again. Suddenly aware that he was still in pajamas, he quickly ran upstairs to change. He came down a minute later and pulled open the door. Standing there, was none other than Ms. Griswold, sporting her usual tight-lipped scowl.

"I thought I told you to take care of your car last night!" she snapped at him, her arms crossed, and her foot tapping an angry beat. Johnny sighed and rolled his eyes. This was going to be fun, he thought. He took in a deep breath before starting.

"Listen, you're a nice neighbor and all, but it's kind of annoying when you keep coming over here and bugging me. I have to say that I find watching paint dry more interesting than listening to your crazy arguments." he said, instantly regretting saying that. Ms. Griswold gasped at such a remark and held back the urge to slap him. "How dare you?" she shouted. Suddenly, everybody on that particular street, who happened to be outside, turned their heads in the direction of the shout. They all stared, round-eyed at the argument.

"How dare _I_?" Johnny demanded. "How dare _you _come on to my property and pretend you're the police? I'm sick and tired of your complaints and I really wished I had checked with my realtor about the neighbors in this area before I moved in. That way, maybe I wouldn't have the utter misfortune of running into you every blasted day." he yelled back at her. Ms. Griswold stiffened.

"Well, let me tell you something, mister!" she started angrily, "I've never ever had to live next to somebody as hare-brained as you and I hope to God that I never have the rotten luck to do so again! I would think it better to just move out!" she countered.

"Really? Is that how that goes? Well, the same to you. And I think you're right. Maybe you _should_ move out. I'm all for that, just to let you know." he snapped at her.

"I hope your mother in-law comes to your wake dressed as an exorcist, you devil!" Ms. Griswold yelled.

"I'm not married." Johnny replied hotly.

"Well, I'm not surprised one bit by that. Not _one _bit!" Ms. Griswold said defiantly.

"Your one to talk, _Ms. _Griswold." Johnny sneered. The two neighbors exchanged glances of pure hatred, until Ms. Griswold turned on her heel and left. Johnny slammed the door and grinned. He then turned to Alf, who was hiding in the umbrella basket with an excited gleam in his eyes. "Thanks for telling me what to say." Johnny thanked the alien.

Yes, while Ms. Griswold had been throwing her accusations out, Alf had been off screen, telling Johnny what to say in reply.

"I really don't think I could've come up with that stuff by myself. I probably would have just given in." Johnny said nodding his approval to Alf. "Alf, how would like to be friends with the second best fireman in Los Angeles?" he asked, extending his hand for Alf to shake it and not really knowing who was the _first _best fireman in Los Angeles. Alf grinned and perked his ears up. "It would be a honor." he put out his furry paw and grabbed the paramedic's hand. They slowly shook hands and exchanged dubious glances. "You know what?" Johnny asked. "I like your style." Alf nodded in agreement. "I like my style too."

"And, boy oh boy, you shoulda seen how mad she was. About as mad as bull being poked with a cattle-prod!" Johnny explained to Roy, very animated as he played back the whole incident in his mind. Roy was sitting at the kitchen table in station Fifty-one, trying to enjoy his morning cup of coffee, but his hand kept shaking. Johnny had explained to him the entire incident with Ms. Griswold and all of Alf's genius, but none of this was amusing to Roy. An alien! Oh, for the love of everything sacred, why had this alien chosen their lives to peril? Roy shook his head and looked down into his coffee. Johnny had finished pacing back and forth after telling his story and he roughly sat down at the table, still grinning.

"I think that that alien is pretty incredible, don't you?" he asked excitedly. Roy looked up at him in despair. "That's the point!" Roy said, "He's an alien! Here on Earth! Living with you! I can't live any longer, bearing a secret that heavy! I feel like Atlas trying to hold up the world, or Christ trying the bear the weight of our sins! It's nerve-racking!" he put his head in his hands and sighed.

"There's got to be some way we can get rid of him!" he suggested.

Roy now had Johnny's attention.

"_Get rid of him?_" Johnny demanded harshly. "I'd never thought I'd say this but, I kind of like Alf!" he then sat back in his chair, staring at Roy. Roy looked frustrated.

"Please don't call him Alf when you're around me! He's not a 'he', he's an 'it'!"

Johnny frowned. "No he's not." Roy shook his head again. "Yes, he really is, if you think about." he argued. "Well, then don't think about it!" Johnny snapped. Roy slammed his fist on the table and stood up. "How can I not?" he asked furiously, "For goodness' sakes, Johnny, he's an alien! An extraterrestrial, that is. Come on; use the brains God gave you!" Johnny smirked; now Roy was starting to sound like Foghorn Leghorn.

"You know what your problem is, Roy?" Johnny started, "Your problem is, you think too much!" Roy was about to say something nasty in return, but the alarm went off and the dispatcher's droning voice came on.

"Squad Fifty-one, man in trouble; thirty-three-forty, Wilson Street."

Johnny and Roy exchanged words unsaid with a dirty look, and then they grudgingly got into the Station's squad car, a red Dodge pickup.

Captain Stanley quickly ran out of his office and wrote down the address stated and handed it to the paramedics. He then picked up the radio transmitter and replied to the dispatcher:

"Squad Fifty-one, KMG, three-six-five." this was a frequent routine for the firemen of Station fifty-one whenever they got a call; it was standard procedure.

When Roy had finished maneuvering through heavy traffic, he stopped the car outside of a small two-story cottage house with gray siding. Surprisingly enough, it had a fenced in yard with two giant oak trees out front. The trees hung over the roof, shading the porch and the front walk. The grass in the yard was sparse, and the stems that had managed to poke through the dry dirt were brown and withered. There was a menacingly large black cat sitting on the top porch step, narrowing its eyes as the paramedics got out of their vehicle. Roy and Johnny grabbed their medical supplies out of the storage compartments on the side of their vehicle and proceeded up the front walk. Roy pushed open the chain-link gate with his shoe and held it open for his partner.

"Why, thank you, dear Sir!" Johnny said in a mock English accent.

Roy would have like to have flourished a curtsey, just to be funny, but his hands were full of medical supplies, so he just nodded.

"You're welcome, my lady." he snickered. Johnny whipped his head around to give Roy a scowl. Right before they had reached the top of the steps, Officers James A. Reed and Peter J. Malloy came walking out, thrumming their batons against their palms. An eccentric looking man with shaggy brown hair sticking out at all places followed them out. His eyes were blue, but they were wide and buggy. He looked to be about five-foot-six and he was wearing a green dress shirt and bell-bottoms that looked as though he had slept in them.

"Officers, wait! I know you don't believe me! But please, I'm serious!" the man shouted after the policemen. Johnny sidled up next to Reed as Malloy went on ahead, and nodded towards the man.

"What's up with him?" Johnny asked in a low voice, to make sure the man didn't hear him. Reed sniffed and shoved his baton back into his belt.

"Donald Fitzgerald. He's an early retiree. Only forty. Used to be a board-certified medicinal scientist with Saint Francis Hospital. I think he's lost it. He claims he saw a furry brown monster in his back yard, chasing his cats. He said it was an extraterrestrial, but the best I can figure it, it was a dog." Reed sighed and shook his head. "But, he's insistent. My partner called you two because he thinks the guy's a nut-job." Johnny nodded in agreement when he saw Mr. Fitzgerald talking rapidly to Roy and gesturing wildly with his arms, his whole face giving away that he must be lost in his own little world. Reed suddenly grinned and started chuckling.

"Yeah, hose-jockey, you should have heard it. One-Adam-Twelve, One-Adam-Twelve! See the man about an extraterrestrial! I bet the sergeant sat bolt upright in his chair when he heard that come in over the static!" Johnny tried not to laugh, but a smile spilled over his face and he couldn't help but snicker a little.

Malloy slammed the police cruiser's door shut and approached Reed.

"We should get going, Reed; there's been a two-eleven, at Wesley's liquor store and from what the sergeant says, the miscreant got away with at least one-grand." he explained. He then cast a glance over at Mr. Fitzgerald, still engaged in his wild conversation, and he rolled his eyes. Reed quickly nodded to Johnny and then ran off to the police cruiser, Malloy following. Once they were in, they flicked on their sirens and sped off.

Johnny watched them go, and then trotted up the front porch steps to listen to what Mr. Fitzgerald had to say.

He suddenly heard something that made his heart lurch.

"…And then, all of a sudden, I see this three-foot tall, furry, brown monster crawl out from under the hydrangeas! It had big pointy cat ears and a long snout, sort of like a pig! It scared the life out of me, but not as bad as when he opened his kisser and tried to swallow my cat whole! Thank goodness that the cat had enough sense to run! I ran and got my carbine, but when I got back, the thing was gone!" Roy shot an "I told you so" glance at Johnny and then nodded to Mr. Fitzgerald.

"Yes Sir, I'm sure it was quite an experience. But, let me take your blood pressure and while I'm doing that, my partner will check the yard." Johnny let out an exasperated sigh. Roy walked down the steps with Johnny and grabbed his arm. He whispered in his ear, "Where did you leave Alf?" Johnny pulled away and shrugged. "Well, at my house." he said. Roy looked away with a thoughtful expression.

"Did you leave him enough food?" Roy asked. Johnny glanced down at his shoes rather guiltily. "Not as much as I should have. But, I'm living paycheck-to-paycheck! I can only afford so much food!" Roy frowned. "He probably ran out of food and went in search of something else to eat…like an unsuspecting cat." Johnny huffed. "

Damn," he muttered, "I should have known better."

Roy nodded in agreement.

"Well, I'll get this guy's blood pressure, you look around."

Johnny didn't respond; he was too upset. But, he looked around anyway. He got to the back yard and ducked under a clothesline. He saw the patch of hydrangeas described by Mr. Fitzgerald and he looked underneath it. He saw a tuft of brown fur, clinging to a broken stem and he grabbed it.

Examining it, he murmured, "Alf, you son of a gun."

"Anyway, I'm sure it was just a dog, after what you suggested." Mr. Donald Fitzgerald admitted half-heartedly, as he followed the paramedics out to their squad car. Roy put the medical supplies back inside the storage compartments and slammed the doors shut. Johnny grinned and patted Mr. Fitzgerald on the shoulder. "Well, your vitals were normal, no indication of a lost mind," he chuckled, but then saw the annoyed look on Donald's face and he grunted, changing the subject.

"Um, if you see anything unusual, give us a call." Johnny finished. Roy then got into the driver's seat and waited for Johnny to get in. They then backed out of their parking space along the side of the street and sped away.

That night, Johnny lay awake in his bed at the fire station, trying to sleep. He tossed and turned, but sleep would not come. It was bad enough that he was an insomniac, but also being kept awake by the thoughts of what Alf might be doing at the moment, scared him to death. Johnny tried to think of other things instead, like, what to do when encountering a structure fire. He imagined himself in a burning house, but suddenly, Alf, wearing a fireman's flame-proof coat and a fire hat, came charging through the flame engulfed kitchen. He was wielding a fire ax, tearing the place apart. He then ran up the stairs, swinging his ax wildly and taking out the stair railing.

Johnny sat bolt upright in his bed, sweating. He threw the covers off of himself and ran out of the dormitory, still in his undershirt and boxer shorts. When he finally made it into the captain's office, he picked up the phone. He quickly dialed his number on the rotary dial and waited for someone to pick up.

_ Oh, if Alf's done anything to my house…I don't want to think about it!_

A very sleepy Alf picked up the phone and yawned.

"This is Gage residence, his former college roommate speaking." Alf said, trying to sound convincing. Johnny closed his eyes and relaxed his grip on the phone cord, in relief.

"Alf, what are you doing?" Johnny asked.

"Talking on the phone to some idiot who didn't tell me that he actually had batteries in his darned smoke detectors!" Alf said accusingly. Johnny stiffened.

"Why, what happened?" he asked, absolutely sure that his heart had skipped a beat.

Alf sighed. "Well, I was baking a foreign dish I saw some barbeque genius do on T.V. and well…I left it in the stove too long and then the whole house started smelling like burnt crocodile meat. The rest is history and your smoke detectors have been cruelly smashed." Johnny almost dropped the phone.

"Did the house catch on fire?" he asked urgently. Alf was silent for a few seconds, but he replied, "No, but your neighbor did come over; I think it was because she saw smoke pillowing out of the kitchen window. Anyway, she left when I slid a note under the door, stating that everything was alright." Johnny tried to relax again, but he didn't, just in case Alf had another surprise for him. Alf then let out a hearty laugh, his voice sounding cracked and muffled over the phone.

"Boy, I sure hope Ms. Griswold can read Mandarin!" he cackled.

Johnny gasped. "You wrote the note in Chinese?" he demanded. Alf suppressed his laugh and explained.

"No, Mandarin, schoolboy. If she can read it, I wonder if she likes lines from Benny Hill." Alf wondered. Johnny was furious; he was going to get so much grief from Ms. Griswold when he got home the next day.

"Alf!" he shouted over the phone.

Alf then slowly hung up.

"Alf!" he shouted again, "Don't you hang up on me! I will kick you out of my house!" Johnny knew that Alf couldn't hear him, but he was blistering with fury. That wise-cracking alien was in so much trouble. Johnny slammed the phone down on the receiver.

He cursed under his breath and kicked the captain's desk. Alf had probably ruined his stove if what he said was true. Not to mention, he still had to confront Alf about the eccentric neighbor who caught a glimpse of the extraterrestrial. Captain Stanley suddenly opened the door to his office and blinked the sleep out of his eyes.

"Gage, what are you doing?" he asked.

Johnny shook his head and stalked out of the office. "Sorry, Cap. Family troubles." he muttered as he went back to bed.

The next day, the firemen of Station Fifty-one were preparing for the end of their shift. The firemen of the "B" shift were already coming in, laughing about how their week went. Johnny envied them; they probably didn't have a furry brown comedian nagging at their conscience. Johnny wanted so badly to get rid of Alf, but yet he couldn't bear the thought of him living anywhere else. To Johnny, Alf felt a sin that he needed absolution for; a heavy secret that needed to be told. He switched his thoughts over to the firemen who had come in and punched the clock. The dispatcher acknowledged the return of the "B" shift and Captain Stanley was already heading out to his car. He waved to Captain Everett and grinned.

"Have fun!" he teased. Captain Everett nodded, his young face revealing that he was not sure what Captain Stanley had meant. Johnny cast a glance over at Captain Everett and thought of what Roy had told him about the young captain. Captain Josh Everett was only twenty-five years old, yet he had gained much respect from the battalion chiefs and aspiring captains of Los Angeles County during the first four years of his job. Everett was among the braver firemen of Battalion Sixteen, though he lacked almost undeniably in personality. He was very short, about the average height for a woman. He had curly red hair and peaceful blue eyes. He always looked sad about something. Johnny didn't know what Everett had to be sad about; he was very lucky to have gained such a high status at such a young age. He was very experienced in the whole career of fire and rescue and it was also his passion. If Johnny had a choice of who he wanted to be beside himself, he'd want to be Everett. The captain may have been dull, but at least he never did anything stupid or idiotic. Everett had a steady income and a nice house, but somehow, he seemed so poor. Johnny stopped thinking about other people's problems and decided to confront his own.

"Well?" Roy asked when Johnny walked into the locker room.

Johnny took off his blue fireman's shirt and didn't reply. Alf was _his _problem, unfortunately, but Roy had no business snooping.

"Have you figured out what you're going to do with him?" Roy persisted.

Johnny opened up his locker and threw his shirt in it. He then slammed the locker door and faced Roy.

"I just don't know. Can't you respect that Alf is my problem, not yours?" Johnny asked.

Roy rolled his eyes.

"He's my problem too! You forgot; I'm the one who made the bitter mistake of finding him! If I had never opened up your locker, none of this would have happened!" Roy said.

Johnny wasn't convinced.

"Would you rather it had been trigger-happy Ropey Carson?" Johnny questioned when he caught sight of Fireman Carson of the "B" shift, standing by his custom locker, sporting a cowboy hat and a camouflage coat. Roy mulled this over when he saw Carson's gun belt hanging off his hip, and a 44. Colt shoved inside the holster.

"That would have been messy," Roy murmured, "is he even allowed to be carrying that thing around here?" Johnny gestured to Carson and cracked a grin. "He's got a license for concealed carry." he argued. Roy snorted.

"Doesn't look very 'concealed' to me." he mumbled. Carson suddenly grabbed his Colt out of his holster and pointed it at his reflection in the mirror above the sink across the locker room.

He pretended to shoot the mirror by jerking his gun. He then lifted the barrel to his mouth and pretended to blow smoke from it.

"I reckon yer on the wrawng side o the border, hippie?" Carson asked. He then put on his fireman's uniform, still sporting the hat, and he ran out to the garage.

Roy cringed. "I wonder what he would've done if he had seen Alf?" he asked. Johnny shrugged.

"He probably would think Alf was some furry bandit and popped his guts full of blanks."

Roy shot Johnny a nasty look and huffed.

"No, I'm serious!" Johnny said. Roy ignored his paramedic partner and just headed out to the parking lot. Johnny followed him, trying to put on his shoes at the same time.

"Hey! Wait!" Johnny said, before falling over in the garage. He hauled himself to his feet and trotted out to stop Roy.

"Where are you going?" Johnny demanded when he saw Roy getting into his Ford pickup.

"Home. Have a nice week!" Roy said with insincere sincerity before speeding off.

As it happened, Johnny did not have a nice week. His days were filled with annoyance and anxiety, caused by none other than Alf. Alf had gotten into the habit of waking up at two o'clock in the morning, just to get a snack from the fridge. He would then proceed to chase the cats around the house, breaking several delicate items that had been foolishly placed on the credenza near the fireplace. Johnny was pardoned enough by fate that his cats didn't get eaten by the rambunctious alien. Although Alf had his ups, not more so than the downs, his presence had put a major dent on Johnny's social life. Anyone could tell you that it would be impossible to have any friends over at your house when you have a wise-cracking alien roaming about. So, Johnny's neighbors began to question his manners. Rumors began to spread that the once-friendly fireman had become anti-social and had decided to take up communicating with spirits instead. Soon, the rumors reached the ears of Johnny himself and he was very put out. This happened over a one-week period, so it's easy imagine how nosey all his neighbors must have been. Plus, Ms. Griswold did confront him about the note in Chinese and stated that she wasn't very amused; at all.

When it was finally time to go work, Johnny was very pleased. He was having such a good day, muddling in his own happy thoughts, that he forgot to remind Alf of the house rules before he left for the fire station. There was no doubt that Alf would take advantage of Johnny's forgetfulness and do something stupid.

After the "C" shift had left, the "A" shift took over once more. Captain Stanley told of a fascinating tale during his week off. It was quite interesting, according to the other firemen, but Johnny was in no mood to listen. The "C" shift had used up all of the medical supplies and had not replenished the stock before the "A" shift had come in. This was a disaster, so Johnny reacted in the way any over-reacting person would. Roy had calmed him down and suggested that they stop by Rampart General Hospital and pick up more supplies. So, the two set off for Rampart General, speeding through traffic in the squad car. When they got to the hospital, it was packed with people.

"Gee, I wonder why there's so many people here." Roy said, grabbing the drug-box before going in. Johnny followed him and rolled his eyes.

"Gee, it's a hospital! Why else would the place be packed?" he said rudely.

Roy gave his partner a look of disdain and pushed open the Emergency Receiving doors. The two paramedics almost got bowled over as a pair of orderlies rushed out, a heavy gurney in tow. Johnny cursed the orderlies and shook his fist at them.

"You idiots!" he cried, "Watch where you're going!"

The orderlies did not look back as they quickly loaded the gurney in their ambulance and sped off.

Roy ignored the frustration that was written all over Johnny's face and pushed him aside.

"Come on, before you decide to hit anybody." Roy said dryly.

They made their way through the crowd of people in the hallway. It was a mixture of patients, doctors and nurses, but it was impossible to tell. The crowd in that ground-floor hallway was like a Black-Friday frenzy. Thankfully, nobody got trampled on.

Roy and Johnny made it to the head nurse's station and gasped for breath.

The head nurse, Nurse Dixie McCall, gave them a look of pity.

"Encounter any trouble on your way here?" she asked innocently.

Roy sniffed. "No, none at all. What about you?" he asked.

Dixie shrugged and flipped through some papers on her clipboard.

"Well, I've been here since one o'clock this morning, so…no." she replied.

Johnny dropped the drug-box on the counter of which Dixie was sitting behind and flew the lid open. "Guess what?" he asked, trying to make himself heard over the noise of the crowd.

"We need some more supplies!" Dixie, unfazed, walked over to the cabinet of medical supplies and pulled out an armful of IV's, packaged syringes and rolls of bandages.

"I'm assuming that this is what you'll need?" she asked.

Roy looked through the supplies, carefully organizing them and counting.

"Three bags of D5W, eight rolls of cloth bandages and five epinephrine syringes." he observed before putting them in the drug-box.

"Wow, you're really on the ball today, despite such uproar." Roy complemented her.

Dixie nodded, rather pleased with herself.

"Yes, well…I have you guys all figured out." she was unable to keep a grin from spilling across her face.

Johnny looked up from the checklist of medical supplies, with a rather alarmed face.

"Wait, wait, wait!" he said, waving his pen at her, "_You_ have _us_ figured out? I'd sooner see a flying pig! Well, I'll admit, Roy here, is a no-brainer; an open book. But I am a very intricate piece of sophistication!" Johnny said, looking back down at his clipboard with a tight expression of authority.

Roy ignored his friend and picked up the drug-box. "Say, where's Doc Brackett?" he asked, turning his head and looking around. Dixie kept a loose expression and sighed.

"He's in the coffee room, joking around with Dr. Early about something some drunk guy said to them. I think it had something to do with a appendectomy, so, yeah." she said mildly. Johnny shrugged. "Hey, at least he's laughing and joking around. He's always walking around with such a serious face." he noted. Dixie rolled her eyes. "His job is serious. You don't expect him to be fooling around when he's doing open-heart surgery? Or do you?" she asked. Johnny shrugged again. "I don't know. You know him better than I do. _A lot better_." he said with a grin. Dixie stiffened at that remark. "I don't know him any better than you do, so don't you dare say things like that again. Don't you think that I might already have people assuming such things behind my back? Teasing me about it? It's more fun to tease than to be teased, let me tell you." she warned. Johnny pretended to be taken aback by the nurse's sudden outburst. The truth was, he knew exactly what he had implied, but he couldn't help it. Everybody pretty much knew that Dixie and Dr. Brackett might, just might, be a _little_ bit more than just friends, and when it's something like that, it's hard not to say anything. Suddenly, Dr. Brackett came out of the coffee room with Dr. Early, laughing wildly.

"I've never broke down laughing that hard in my entire life! It wasn't what he said, it was _how _he said it!" Dr. Brackett explained through his laughs. Dr. Early nodded with a smile.

"I'm sure." he agreed. Dr. Brackett then calmed down and approached the paramedics. "Hello, Johnny, Roy." he acknowledged, nodding his head to them. Roy nodded in return, "Having a good day?" he asked with a grin. Dr. Brackett sniffed. "So far." he then turned to Dixie, who was pretending to be busy writing something down. The doctor fell for it and turned back to the paramedics. "Any real serious calls? I've haven't handled any Fifty-one calls for a while. I take it that that's a good thing?" he questioned with a serious face.

Roy shifted his gaze. "Yeah, well, I guess people are just smartening up." he suggested. Johnny shook his head. "When people start smartening up, our paychecks start thinning down." he warned. Dr. Brackett smiled briefly, then looked at Dr. Early.

"Ask if Liz got the results for Fischer's blood tests. I need know right away." he said curtly. Dr. Early nodded at his much younger colleague. "Yes, boss." he joked. He then turned and walked away, holding his clipboard under his arm. Dr. Brackett looked like he wanted to say something, but suddenly thought better of it. "So, off the subject Roy, how's the kitchen remodeling going?" he asked. Roy looked a little unsure. "Okay, I guess. I've been working so many shifts lately, that I just kind of left it up Joanne, to see what she wants to do. I mean, she's the one who wanted the whole darn thing remodeled anyway, so I don't really have a place to say what should go where or what something should look like. It's been interesting." he explained. Johnny rolled his eyes and slumped his shoulders. Is this what middle-aged people did? Talk about stupid, boring things that didn't concern somebody like him? Dr. Brackett nodded thoughtfully. "Hey, have either of you seen Rogers or Everett lately? They haven't been coming in for Squad Thirty-eight. I thought that they might be sick or something?" he wondered. "Oh, they've been captains for a few months now. They're real happy with their sudden progress." Roy replied. Dr. Brackett stood up straight. "I didn't know that. I wonder why they didn't tell me. I think Rogers might have said something about it, but I didn't really think that he'd be a captain so soon. Now, Everett…he didn't say anything at all. He kind of keeps to himself." Dixie snorted. "That doesn't surprise me one bit." she muttered. Dr. Brackett looked at her. "Why do say that, Dix?" he asked. She raised her chin up and narrowed her eyes. "He's antisocial. He doesn't talk to anyone at all. Not even me. I asked him a question a while back and he wouldn't answer. No matter how hard I pressed, I could never get him to utter a word. Rogers is the only one who really understands him, though. I don't know how. Everett seems impossible to get to." Dr. Brackett gave Dixie a silencing look. "I think I know what his problem is." he murmured. Now _this _was something Johnny was interested in. Okay, yeah, it was gossip, maybe that was it. But, it was better than talking about kitchens and gardens and houses and all that junk.

"Oh yeah, what?" Dixie asked defiantly.

Dr. Brackett took in a deep breath before continuing in his usual smooth, deep voice.

"Well, you see, Everett was always at the top of his game. He really loved his job as a fireman, but his wife never did agree with him on that. From what I heard, she was always trying to get him to quit. And they fought bitterly about it, but Everett being the way he was, stuck with it and ignored his wife's anger." Dr. Brackett then looked thoughtful and paused. "I don't think it was really anger as he said it was." he continued, "I believe it was worry. Worry about her husband getting killed in a fire. Well, anyway, one day, Everett was working a double shift, and his wife was working at her office that day as well. Now you see, Everett didn't know his wife was working as well, and he thought she was staying home to watch their three year-old child, Timothy. Well, Timothy managed to get out of the house when they were gone. I guess he was just tall enough to reach the handle on the sliding back door. Well, Everett called his wife at home, to check in on her. When she didn't pick up, he came to the startling realization that she went to work. His wife must've done the exact same thing, because both of them raced home. They met each other right at the front door and searched the house. The found Timothy's body in the backyard pool."

Dixie gasped and Roy's eyes grew round. Johnny cocked his head. Dr. Brackett shook his head sadly and continued,

"Everett tried everything he could in his years of being a paramedic, but, it was too late. I was here when he brought his son in. Already dead. After that, his wife kind of snapped and she blamed Everett for Tim's death and divorced him, saying that it if he hadn't have been so wrapped up in his career, more than he was in his family's relationship, Tim might have lived. As you can imagine, Everett retreated into a world of his own, made up of bitterness and a life of missed chances. Malloy told me that Everett never forgave himself for what happened that day and he still thinks about it. I guess that's why he doesn't talk to anyone. Maybe he's afraid they'll bring up his son's death and try to comfort him. I find that sometimes, in cases like that, it's best not to try anything to cheer the person up. They usually come out of it and move on."

"And, where'd you get your psychiatry degree?" Dixie asked playfully.

Suddenly, Dr. Early poked his head out of one of the treatment rooms.

"Kell, are you going to sit there all day and gossip with firemen, or are you going to help me stitch this guy's leg back together?" he demanded in a mock-angry tone. Dr. Brackett brightened. "Alright, I'll be right there, Joe." he then turned back to Dixie and the paramedics. "See you guys later." he said quickly. He then hurried over to the treatment room, swinging his stethoscope around his finger.

"So, yeah. Talk about a tough week." Johnny said as he watched Alf grab a handful of popcorn from the bowl on his lap. They were both seated on the couch, watching an episode of Stomach Pump. Alf shoved another handful of popcorn in his mouth and chewed sloppily. Johnny reached his hand into the bowl, but felt nothing but seeds.

"Ugh." he scoffed.

Alf looked down into the bowl and gave Johnny an apologetic look.

"Sorry, I forgot to eat the seeds." he said bluntly. He then put the lip of the bowl to his mouth and tipped it, sending the seeds rolling into the back of his throat. When he had finished the last one off, he burped.

"Well, I'm heading off to the ol' laundry basket." he stated, sliding off the couch and waddling off. Johnny raised his eyebrows.

"Don't you want to watch the rest of the show?" he asked, in a surprised voice.

"No thanks. I already know who Janet's real father is. Besides, the only reason I even agreed to watch it with you, is so I'd get some popcorn." he explained.

"_Some _popcorn?" Johnny asked.

Alf then turned and headed to the laundry room to get some shut eye. Johnny suddenly felt a pang of guilt that Alf had to sleep on some old bed sheets in a basket instead of having the luxury of a real bed.

"Wait, I have a guest bedroom!" Johnny blurted out.

Alf turned around and perked his ears up. "Do tell." he said excitedly. Johnny then regretted ever mentioning such a thing and he wanted to slap himself around.

"Um, yeah. It's upstairs. It does have a bed in it, but it never gets used and I figured you might want to sleep on something more comfortable than sheets in a laundry basket." he mumbled. Alf quickly bolted upstairs. Johnny sighed and followed him. He was just in time to see the alien swing open the bedroom door and jump on the bed. Alf landed on the bed, then cringed in disgust.

"What is this? A Romanian orphanage?" he demanded, "Where are the sheets?"

Johnny leaned against the door jam and crossed his arms. "I was going to tell you that the bed didn't have any sheets, but you ran upstairs so fast, I couldn't get a word out." he stated bluntly. Alf slid off the bed and waddled over to the closet.

"There's nothing in here!" he shouted. Johnny rolled his eyes.

"Just be glad I'm letting you stay in my house at all. Once I locate your family, I'm booting you out." he said harshly. Alf looked down at his feet guiltily. Johnny noticed and knew right away that something was up.

"What? What is it?" he asked urgently. Alf shrugged.

"Well, no matter how hard you look, you're not going to be able to find my family."

Johnny blinked. "W-what?" he demanded. Alf didn't look like he wanted to say anymore, but he went on. "That story I told you about my family not wanting me….well, I made it up. I ended up here by mistake." he explained slowly. Johnny frowned. "But everything else was true? Melmac, the cookies and what not?" he asked. Alf nodded. "Yes. But the reason I got here was…there was this kid; named Marty." the alien continued.

"Marty who?"

"Marty McFly. He had this new space-age DeLorean car and I wanted to take it for a spin. It was really nice and so, when he wasn't looking, I got in and took it around the block."

"And you went farther than you intended?" Johnny pressed.

"Not exactly. I was really getting the feel and I wanted to push it faster. Amazingly, I got up to eighty-eight miles per hour. Then I started seeing some real shi-" he was cut off by Johnny.

"Wait, so you're telling me that you stole some poor sap's car and ran away with it?" Johnny asked in disbelief. "No, you didn't let me finish!" Alf spat angrily.

"After I got up to that speed, everything changed; the roads were different, the cars were different, but yet, everything was still the same." he trailed off. Johnny couldn't make sense of what the alien was trying to say. "Sounds to me like you did more than drive a car. Are you sure you didn't take a few swigs of beer?" he said, his voice bubbling with amusement.

Alf didn't look amused, which was a rarity.

"No, I'm telling you, that somehow, I don't know how…I traveled back in time!"

Johnny blinked again and sat down on the sheet-less bed.

"Time travel?" he asked. Alf nodded. "I think so. I looked at all the calendars I could find and they confirmed my beliefs. Just look at the way you're dressed." Alf said pointedly, cringing. Johnny looked offended. "What? This is the latest thing. Everybody's wearing it." he snorted. Alf rolled his eyes.

"Bell bottoms, ridiculously patterned shirts and outlandish hair? You're living in the stone-age, Johnny-baby!" Alf laughed. Johnny shot him a dirty look and changed the subject.

"You want me to believe that you time traveled from…" he hadn't asked Alf what year he had been living in before. "Nineteen-eighty-six, baby." the alien finished.

"…Back to nineteen seventy-four?" Johnny noted, gesturing to Alf's furry crop of hair sticking up from the top of his head and draping over his forehead. Alf rubbed his paws together, like he was about to bite into a T-bone steak.

"This could prove to be interesting." he said, unable to contain his excitement at meeting somebody from such a primitive year. Johnny looked flustered and confused, which wasn't uncommon for him, but trying to believe that some alien he had never even heard of before, had crash-landed on earth and had traveled back in time with a time-traveling DeLorean, was just to much for him to comprehend.

"Dang it all to heck, Alf! Are you lying? Time travel isn't possible!" he shouted, his stress level mounting to an all-time high. Alf shrugged.

"Man, Marty's gonna be really ticked off." he said, nodding his head up and down. Johnny's shoulder's went rigid and he put his hands on the side of his face.

"Oh Lord, this isn't happening!" he moaned, sliding his hands over his eyes and leaning his elbows on his knees. Alf sidled up next to the paramedic and patted him on the back. "It's okay. I had a hard time believing that I was dumb, too. Until the Tanners told me, anyway." he said aloud, with no sympathy whatsoever. Johnny stood up and left the room. Alf watched him go and jumped on the bare bed.

"What a luxury." Alf stated proudly. He sneezed and saw dust fly up from the mattress. "Ugh. The next time he cleans his house, maybe he'll take one step closer to the vacuum cleaner."

Downstairs, Johnny was in the kitchen, popping open a bottle of whiskey and pouring some into a glass. "I never thought it would come to this." he murmured. "If only I had listened to my parents and finished my police training, none of this would of happened." he said sadly.

Suddenly, the phone rang on the kitchen counter. He turned in his chair and reached for it. When he picked it up he grunted, "Hello?" on the other end, was Roy DeSoto.

"Um, are you coming to work tomorrow?" he asked. "You've been taking a lot of days off and Captain Stanley is thinking about transferring you." he said. Johnny scowled.

"That would be a saving grace." he spat, "Out of this stupid town and somewhere far away…maybe in South Africa. There, I can live my life free of extraterrestrials of any kind and I can say whatever I want without having somebody combat it with some wise remark." Roy was speechless.

"I take it that Alf is giving you trouble?" he asked wryly. Johnny sniffed and looked down into his whiskey glass. "Yeah."

Roy sighed. "Don't worry. I have an idea. We'll take Alf out on runs with us tomorrow, and he can pose as our mascot!" Johnny cringed. "Roy, are you feeling alright? That idea sounds pretty out of sight." Roy nodded. "Yeah, I know. It's really far out. But, I think it will work. We just have to get permission from the board to have a mascot come with us on our runs and then everything will be okay! You can foster an alien _and _keep your job!" he said happily. Johnny didn't bother thinking about it anymore. He was very dismissive of Roy at times and it usually led to trouble. "Yeah, yeah, alright. Whatever. See you tomorrow." Johnny grumbled. He then slammed the phone down on the receiver and put his bottle of whiskey back in the cabinet above the sink. As he looked closer in the cabinet, he saw that his whole bag of chips had been opened. Out of curiosity, Johnny reached for the bag. When he pulled it out, chips came pouring out of the bottom of the bag. Several fell on the floor, in the sink and on Johnny's head. He scowled; there was no doubt that Alf was the mastermind of ultimate pranks. Johnny wished that had remembered to remind Alf not to mess with any of the food in the cabinets while he was at work. What a stupid thing to forget. Alf should have known. This was the consequence for the poor fireman's forgetfulness. There was also the lingering possibility that his neglect had caused the loss of many a chip. Barbeque, in fact. What a waste. He hoped that the rest of his food hadn't been tampered with, but with Alf, anything was possible.

"Sooooo…." Captain Stanley started, rubbing his chin as he looked down at the furry three-foot tall mascot with a long zipper down the front of his chest. "He's going with you on runs to observe the work of paramedics?" the captain said doubtfully, casting a glance at Johnny, who was fidgeting next to Roy. "Um, yes." Johnny replied.

"All I can say is that you better keep him in line. And make sure he doesn't get sweaty in that _ridiculous _outfit." Captain Stanley warned. Alf looked like he wanted to make a snappy remark, but Johnny gave him a "you better not" look. Captain Stanley brightened.

"Oh, yes." he continued, "He'll have to wear a fire hat, to let people know that he's with you. Although I sure as hell wouldn't want to be caught dead with some midget dressed like _that_." he said coolly. Alf scowled. "Well, aren't you friendly? But, let me tell you something; _I _sure as heck wouldn't want to be caught dead with an ugly thing like you." Captain Stanley's eyes widened. Johnny winced and Roy's jaw dropped open; nobody dared talk to the captain like that. Not ever. Alf steadily held the captain's gaze, a triumphant gleam in his black eyes. Captain Stanley said nothing, but turned on his heel and stormed back into his office. When Johnny was sure the captain was gone, he turned and faced the alien.

"_ALF!_" he screeched in a whisper. "What did you do that for? You could've gotten into some real trouble!" Alf held his chin up in defiance. "He insulted me."

Johnny frowned. "You better not make cracks like that when you go out on runs with us."

Alf cocked his head. "Well in that case, I'll be running so hard, I won't be able to make any insults." Roy looked at Johnny and mouthed the words: "How dumb is he?" Johnny glanced back at Alf and crouched down to be level with him.

"Um, when we say runs, we mean emergency calls. People call in to the 911 dispatch center and then the dispatcher assigns a station or copter to the emergency, and sometimes, we get called out. We receive the address over the station's radio and if it's a small medical emergency or something two paramedics can deal with, Roy and I get called out. If it's big fire or something really bad, the engine _and _the squad get called out. It just really depends. But, we call medical emergencies, runs. It all makes sense if you think about it."

Alf mulled all this over and nodded. "Way to confuse a guy, Johnny-boy." he said curtly. Johnny stood up straight and sighed. "Sorry. I'll speak in English from now on." he said sarcastically. Suddenly, fireman Chet Kelly came into the garage, eating an apple.

"Who is the guy in the anteater suit?" he asked through a mouthful of apple.

Roy got in front of Johnny, to make sure his partner didn't say anything stupid.

"Oh, him?" he asked innocently. "He' s just an observer, advertising for some fire hose company!" he explained quickly. Chet looked down skeptically at Alf and raised an eyebrow. "Gordon Shumway's the name, hoses are my game!" Alf said in a salesman voice. Chet grunted and took another bite of his apple. "Aren't you gonna get hot in that dumb-looking suit? You know, Los Angeles weather can be brutal in the summer. Our temperatures reach over a hundred and two degrees. You'll be dead, right when you step out of this air conditioning." he said scornfully. Alf looked up at the fireman and nodded.

"Well, I'm sure it's nothing I can't handle. Where I come from, the summers reach over four-thousand degrees!" he bragged. Johnny and Roy winced at Alf's words and Chet stopped midway in biting into his apple and froze, looking down at Alf. Johnny held his breath and Roy forced a grin. Chet then shook his head. "Looks like the heat's already gotten to him." he said sadly. He then turned and walked away. Johnny let his breath out and Roy relaxed his shoulders and let his smile fade. They both looked down expectantly at Alf. Alf totally ignored them and waddled over to the fire engine. "How much water does this thing hold?" the alien asked, looking at the complicated water pressure controls on the side of the massive vehicle. Johnny leaned up against it.

"Quite a beauty, ain't she?" he asked. "I'd say she can hold at least a thousand gallons, taken she's not exactly a tanker. Now a tanker, can hold over two-thousand gallons." he explained. Alf nodded, carefully looking at his reflection in the truck's paint.

"Interesting." he murmured. Johnny thought he detected a mischievous look cross Alf's face. "What?" the alien asked when he noticed Johnny staring at him like he had two heads or something. Suddenly, the alarm sounded, and the dispatcher's voice came on.

"Squad Fifty-one…" the dispatcher started. Johnny jerked his head up and motioned for Alf to come along. "That's us!" he said quickly. Captain Stanley came out of his office and listened to the address and statement the dispatcher gave. He shook his head as he wrote the address down and murmured, "Good heavens, another heart patient."

Johnny opened the squad car's passenger door and waited for Alf to climb in. Alf grabbed the seat and hoisted himself up. He grunted as he tried to pull himself in all the way, but his legs swung wildly in midair. Johnny sighed in exasperation and gave Alf a shove in the rear. Alf tumbled in and then sat up in the middle seat. Roy was already in the driver's seat, his fire hat strapped on and his expression portraying his usual unflappable-ness. Johnny got in and squeezed next to Alf. He slammed the passenger's door shut and reached behind him, grabbing his fire hat. He strapped it around his narrow chin and then reached down under the middle seat for Alf's fire hat. He shoved it on Alf's short head and tightened the strap around the alien's throat. Johnny resisted the temptation to tighten the strap until Alf couldn't breathe, the thought making him grin.

Roy jerked the car forward as the garage door lifted. Roy then flicked the sirens on. Alf shouted with excitement and Roy laughed.

"That was my reaction on my first time." he chuckled, his gaze locked on the road. Cars in front of them pulled off to the side of the road to let the emergency vehicle pass.

Johnny rested his arm on the open window sill and sighed with annoyance as Alf's fur made his left arm itch. Alf got excited when he saw the window open and he clapped his hands together. "Oooo! Can I stick my head out the window? Please, please?" he begged. Roy glanced quickly at Johnny. Alf turned to Johnny, with a pleading expression. Johnny scoffed in disgust and slid over to the middle seat as Alf crossed his lap. Johnny grunted loudly when he felt Alf's heavy weight. When the alien got to the passenger's seat, he took off his fire hat and stuck his head out the window. His crop of hair waved behind him and he opened his mouth, letting his tongue slop over his jaw like a dog. Johnny cringed and looked away.

Alf laughed and he sounded like somebody whose tongue was being held down to the ground with a stick.

"Is is un!" he shouted happily. Johnny glanced briefly at the window crank and grinned. He reached over to it slowly and clenched it. Roy saw this at the corner of his vision and kicked Johnny in the leg with his shoe. Johnny grimaced in pain and let go of the window crank. Alf finally stuck his head back in and rolled the window up.

"I like this job!" he exclaimed.

When they pulled up at the house, they were quickly surrounded by a whole group of neighbors who had come to help. They stopped when they saw Alf climb out of the squad car.

"_What_ is _that_?" a woman asked, screwing up her nose.

Johnny was getting tired of explaining, but he did it anyway. "He's a mascot advertising for some fire hose company." he sighed, grabbing the medical supplies out of the storage compartments. Roy nodded. "Yeah. He's observing us too." the woman looked like she didn't really believe it, but she didn't say anything else. Alf followed the paramedics up the front steps of the small yellow house and walked with them through the narrow doorway.

Alf walked on ahead of them and waddled into the living room. He raised his ears when he saw an obese man laying on the floor, holding a bag of chips in his hand and moaning. Alf snorted. "Who is this fatso?" he asked scornfully. Johnny sighed.

"This is our heart patient." he said softly, trying not to let an edge slip into his voice. Alf snorted again. "More like a fat patient." he said aloud, making Roy smirk. The two paramedics knelt down next to the patient and flipped open the drug box.

"Alright, what's the problem?" Roy asked sharply. The patient opened his eyes. "Ugh…..I think it's my heart. I feel like a elephant's sitting on me!" he complained. Alf laughed.

"Good Lord, man! You _are _an elephant!" he shouted. The patient blinked slowly at Alf and then looked back at the paramedics. "Who is he?" the patient asked.

"An observer." Johnny growled. Roy huffed and took the patient's pulse. "What's your name?" he asked. The patient grunted and grasped his chest. "Albert Dennis. I work as an accountant downtown. Worst job ever." he moaned. Roy then took the patient's blood pressure. "When did your chest pains start?" he asked. The patient let out a long breath just as Johnny was checking his pupils. Johnny flinched away when he caught a whiff of the man's breath. Johnny put the crook of his elbow up to his face and coughed. The patient continued to think. "About fifteen minutes ago, right after Candid Camera went off the T.V." Johnny screwed up his nose. "Pupils are equal and reactive." he choked out, still trying to get the lingering smell of the patient's breath out of his nose. Alf sat down on the coffee table and watched the firemen work, while messing with the portable fire radio. Roy took out the bio-phone and called up Rampart General Hospital.

"His respiration's steady. That's a good sign." he said in a low voice.

At Rampart, Dr. Brackett was responding to Squad Fifty-one's pager. "Rampart, this is Squad Fifty-one." Roy's voice came in over the static. Dr. Brackett sighed and got out his notepad and pen. "Go ahead, Fifty-one," he replied.

Roy glanced over at the patient and recited the patient's vitals. "Uh, Rampart, we have a male patient here, age about, thirty-five. He is…um…very obese. Pulse is seventy, pupils are equal and reactive, respiration is twenty. Blood pressure is one-ten over seventy." he said, tapping his pen on the bio-phone.

Dr. Brackett frowned. That didn't sound like a heart patient. Sounded more like a lazy patient. "Fifty-one, start an IV with D5W and transmit an EKG." he commanded.

"Ten-four Rampart, IV, D5W and transmitting EKG on lead two." Roy replied, as he set up the medical equipment to send an EKG. Right when he was peeling off the adhesive covering for the electrodes, Alf turned on the T.V. and started flicking through the channels. The patient sat bolt upright and knocked Roy off his knees.

"Son of a-" Roy was cut off by the patient exclaiming wildly, "Oh my gosh! I missed this episode a few days ago!" he said when Alf switched the channel over to Stomach Pump.

Roy tried to pull the patient back down, but it was almost impossible. Johnny figured he should intervene. He'd seen this episode before.

"Albert," he started calmly, "Phillip died in the OR and Janet's real father is Gilbert Donnelly. It was all a big lie and Rick was behind it all. Denise got mad and slammed the door in his face. After that, Nurse Goodrich confessed her love for Elton and that's where it ended." he explained, getting the patient to lie back down. "What? So you mean that Janet isn't of noble blood and is never going to truly be a Wright?" the patient asked sadly. Johnny shook his head. "I'm afraid not."

The patient lay back down and stared up at the ceiling. Roy cast a glance over at Johnny and mouthed, "Thank you". Johnny slowly nodded and turned the T.V. off. Alf hung his head.

"I wanted to watch it again." he moaned. Johnny shot him a silencing look and looked down at the patient. "We're putting these electrodes on your chest so we can record your heart activity and send it back to the hospital, there, they'll be able to find out what's going on with you." Johnny explained. The patient nodded. "And I'm going to start an IV as well. Just keep calm, it doesn't hurt." Johnny added. Alf was aware of Engine Fifty-one pulling up in the man's driveway and the firemen jumping off.

"Hey, Desoto, who called the dispatch and asked for an engine?" he asked with a grin. "Wha…?" Roy trailed off, looking out the window. Captain Stanley pushed the door open and walked in, his loyal firemen behind him. "There's no fire here." he declared angrily.

"We never said there was a fire here!" Johnny said, standing up and taking off his stethoscope. Alf grinned. "Ha! You walked into that one, Hank!" he shouted, pointing at the disgruntled fire captain. Captain Stanley scowled. He then flicked his gaze back to Johnny and backed him up against the wall.

"I told you to keep him in line! And look what he's done! He called us out from a serious chemical fire and Twenty-four had to cover for us! From what the dispatch said, your little mascot must've told him that you two had been killed in a gas explosion!" the captain accused. Alf laughed and gestured to the obese patient.

"Hey! It could've happened!" he cackled wildly. Roy stood up straight and pushed the captain away from Johnny. "Would either of you like to tell me just what the hell is going on here?" Johnny shrugged timidly. "I-I don't know!" he stammered under the captain's glare.

"You!" Captain Stanley pointed to Alf. "I'll string you up by your ankles and hook you on the back of the engine and drag you all the way back to the station, you rat!" he shouted.

Suddenly, the patient clutched his chest. "Hey guys," he groaned, "I don't feel so well."

He went rigid and then fell limp. Johnny and Roy whipped their heads around when they heard the plaintive drone of the EKG machine, declaring death. Dr. Brackett's voice came on the bio-phone in an angry shout. "Dammit, Fifty-one, where the hell are you? Defibrillate!" he commanded. They bolted to the patient's side and yanked out the defibrillator. Roy charged it and counted.

"Four-hundred watts, clear!" he shouted. Johnny positioned the paddles on the patient's chest and gave him a shock. The patient's body jerked upward and the EKG machine's drone turned into an unsteady beep. Roy sighed and Johnny threw the paddles aside.

"Sinus rhythm, although he's throwing premature vascular contractions. Let's keep a good eye on him and monitor his vitals closely." Roy suggested. Johnny nodded breathlessly. Alf was watching the whole ordeal in horror, as well as the other firemen. Captain Stanley took out his portable fire radio and pulled out the antenna. He lifted it to his mouth and pressed the transmit button. "This is Engine Fifty-one to dispatch, please send an ambulance to this location." he requested. "Ten-four, Fifty-one." the dispatcher replied.

Before long, an ambulance pulled up in the driveway and two ambulance attendants rushed into the house with a gurney. Roy and Johnny helped lift the patient onto the gurney, grunting with the effort. The attendants strapped the patient down and hauled him into the ambulance. Several spectators watched, slack-jawed. Roy picked up the equipment. "I'll go to the hospital with him, you can follow behind in the squad." Roy said to Johnny. Alf followed the bitter paramedic into the squad car and hung his head as Johnny sped along behind the ambulance. Alf looked up at Johnny, whose expression was unreadable.

"Listen, I'm sorry about what happened back there, I just thought it would be funny-" Alf started, but was cut off. "-To kill someone?" Johnny demanded, flicking his gaze from the road, to Alf's guilty face. "I gave you the run-through before you came to the station and I trusted you to show some self-control, instead, you call out an engine and distract us from our duty!" he continued, his voice very sharp. Alf looked down.

"I said I was sorry." he mumbled disdainfully. Johnny frowned.

"'Sorry' doesn't bring dead people back to life! And you don't have me to apologize to, you have all those firemen you called out, the patient _and_ Roy to say your sorry to." he said scornfully. Alf scowled. "But you saved the patient and I said I was sorry, to you at least, and I thought I'd get better reaction than _this_!" he griped.

"Let's get one thing straight, I'm not a priest and I'm not gonna give you absolution, so don't tell _me_ you're sorry for something you know you damn well shouldn'ta done!" Johnny shot back. Alf crossed his arms like an impudent child, sulking.

When they pulled up at the hospital, Roy was already helping the orderlies get the patient out of the ambulance and into the emergency room. Dixie came out and took a look at the patient. "Put him in three." she said curtly. The orderlies rushed the gurney with the unconscious patient, straight into a treatment room, where Dr. Brackett was waiting.

"Let's start him on O2, and give him a new IV." the doctor ordered his nurses. They both nodded quickly and did what they were told.

Meanwhile, Johnny was getting out of the squad car, with Alf right behind him.

"Now, try to act natural, I'm sure you can do that much." Johnny commanded the sullen alien. Alf nodded and got on all fours. He pretended to be a cow chewing grass and he started to moo. Johnny quickly stood Alf up, right when a nurse he happened to know, came walking through the emergency receiving doors.

"Not that natural!" he hissed. Alf stood up and whistled at the nurse.

The red haired student nurse flicked her gaze over to Johnny, whom she thought had whistled.

She then looked down at what looked to be a midget dressed in some furry suit, with an ill-placed zipper glued to his chest.

She didn't say anything, but scoffed at Johnny's choice of acquaintances, and strutted off. Johnny sighed as she walked away and looked down at Alf.

"Thanks a lot. I have a feeling I'm not going to be seeing _her_ tomorrow night." he grumbled. Alf shrugged, but he was sick of apologizing for everything, so he didn't say anything. They went into the hospital and approached the head nurse's counter.

"Hello, Dix." Johnny said uncomfortably, painfully aware that he was being followed by a three-foot tall extraterrestrial. Alf perked his ears up when he saw Dixie and he looked like he wanted to say something, but Johnny stepped of Alf's foot, warning him not to say anything stupid.

"Who is this?" Dixie asked playfully, blissfully _unaware_ that this little mascot could possibly be from any planet _but_ Earth. Johnny rolled his eyes.

_ Here we go again, _he thought bitterly. "He's an observer coming with us on runs." Johnny said, wanting to close the subject. Dixie sensed that she had hit a nerve, asking that question and nodded slowly. "I won't ask anything else." she said with a grin. Johnny let his shoulders relax a little. "Thank you." he breathed. Alf nodded to Dixie and rested his arm on the counter casually. "You come here often?" he asked. Dixie looked un-amused.

"Well, I work here, so…yeah." she replied flatly. Alf raised an eyebrow.

"Do you like Italian food?" he questioned. Dixie looked straightly at him and tilted her head.

"Listen, you're nice and all, but I have no doubt that I'm over twenty-five years older than you." she said truthfully. Johnny nodded with a slight grin.

"This is true." he agreed. Dixie flashed him a dirty look and turned her gaze to Dr. Brackett as he approached the counter.

"Don't worry about a thing, Mr. Dennis will be alright. Of course, I'm hoping the hospital's dietician will start him on an exercise program. Heaven knows he needs it!" he chuckled. He stopped laughing when he saw Johnny's sullen expression and his furry friend standing next to him. He was about to ask, but Dixie spoke up.

"Paramedic observer." she said in a low voice. Johnny nodded hesitantly. Dr. Brackett raised his eyebrows, taking in the furry observer.

"Well, I always said that the public should be aware about the fire department's contribution to society." he said simply. Roy walked up to the counter, swinging his fire radio around by it's strap.

"Alright," he started, "Johnny, I think we should get going. It's my turn to cook tonight and I want to get back in time so I can put the ham in the oven." Dr. Brackett smirked and Johnny wanted to roll his eyes, but his eyes were tired from all the rolling he'd been doing lately.

"One week of my pay for some lousy ham that you're probably gonna burn." he complained. Roy narrowed his eyes.

"Come on, I took the beginner cooking course before I got married to Joanne. Besides, I'm pretty handy with the oven." Johnny grinned.

"Says the one who burnt all the pancakes last shift and had to put the fire out with his own extinguisher." he joked. Roy punched him playfully in the arm.

"I'd like to see _you_ flip ten pancakes while balancing a whole bowl full of scrambled eggs on your head. Not easy." he shot back. Dixie waved them off.

"You two better go available before the dispatcher catches on to you!" she chuckled. Dr. Brackett nodded in agreement. "Don't forget your mascot." he warned.

At the mention of "mascot", Alf stood straight up and followed the paramedics outside.

"See you later." Roy called back to Dixie and Dr. Brackett.

When the squad arrived back at the station, Alf was the first to hop out and rush to the kitchen table. "Bring me the food!" he said with anticipation. Roy turned him off.

"I haven't even unwrapped the ham yet, so put your fork and knife down before you poke Chet in the face and blind him." Roy said. At the mention of his name, Chet pulled down his newspaper from his face and frowned.

"Naw, we don't have that kind of luck." Johnny joked, sitting down at the table to peel some potatoes for supper. Chet snorted rudely and flicked his newspaper back up to his face.

Captain Stanley then walked in and crossed his arms. "Alright, who is setting the table tonight?" he asked. He looked around the room. Marco and Mike turned up the volume on the radio, pretending they didn't hear him. Chet smirked and looked at Johnny, who was peeling sweet potatoes and muttering to himself.

"I volunteer Gage!" he said quickly. Johnny looked up with a surprised expression.

"What? I set it last time! Besides, you complained because you said you didn't like it when I folded your napkin into a swan!" Johnny replied hotly.

Roy looked back from putting the ham in the oven. "Why don't we have Mr. Shumway set it?" he asked. Alf looked up from reading over Chet's shoulder and shouted.

"Why? I don't want to!" he complained. Roy gave him a look of disdain.

Alf soon gave in. "Oh, alright. Only if I get seconds on the ham." he agreed hesitantly.

All of sudden, the alarm went off and the dispatcher's voice came on.

"Station Fifty-one, Engine One-twenty-nine, Station Twenty-four, Squad Fifteen, structure fire….." all the firemen got up and ran into the garage. Alf followed them more slowly. Captain Stanley wrote down the address, handed it to the paramedics and responded to the dispatcher. He then ran over to the fire engine and got in.

Alf hauled himself into the squad car and put his hat on. Johnny did the same and slammed the door shut.

"Now this is when the real action happens." he declared with a tone to his voice that told Alf that there was more to what the paramedic had said, than Alf could ever know.

Roy maneuvered the squad car beautifully through traffic, the fire engine following close behind; both vehicles were blaring their sirens. Alf was quivering with excitement.

They soon pulled up to a four story apartment building, engulfed in flames and fire licking up into the night sky. There were numerous shouts and screams coming from inside the building.

Several fire companies had arrived and their was a battalion chief barking out orders left and right. Captain Stanley got off the fire engine and walked over to Roy and Johnny.

"You two," he started, "Go into the building and get out any civilians, call for a ladder if you need one. You know the drill." the two paramedics nodded quickly as they strapped on their oxygen tanks. Johnny slapped on his mask, but then started coughing.

"What the hell is in this tank?" he demanded. Alf looked up. "Air freshener. I thought you might appreciate it." he said bashfully.

"Alf!" Johnny shouted. "We can't go into that fire breathing air freshener! Not only is it a fire hazard, we could die of it's toxicity!" Roy shook his head.

"It's in my tank too." Johnny wanted so badly to strangle Alf, but his hands were shaking too much with rage. "Now what are we supposed to do?" he cried. Roy threw his oxygen tank on the ground.

"We go in anyway. Those people need our help. Do you think that they have the luxury of breathing pure oxygen while trapped up there? I don't think so. Let's go and make it quick. Alf, you stay here. You've already caused enough trouble as it is. I don't want to have to rescue you as well." Roy said calmly.

Johnny and Roy quickly trotted over to the building and ran inside. Captain Everett caught a glimpse of them going in without masks and widened his eyes.

"Oh no." he murmured, "That's an accident waiting to happen."

The two firemen ran into the flame engulfed building; searing heat made them wince. Suddenly, a loud scream sounded from upstairs. "Let's check all the rooms, I'll take the upstairs, you take the downstairs." Johnny suggested. Roy nodded quickly and ran over to an open room. Johnny ran upstairs towards the scream and shielded his face with his arm. He could feel the flames' heat on his back, even through his fire coat. Suddenly, a piece of burning ceiling fell down, just behind him. He whipped around, only to get pelted with burning wood flying up from the impact. He ran up the stairs and dodged more blistering wood. The screams were getting louder, so Johnny knew he must've been getting closer.

He kicked open a door and saw nothing but tall flames lapping around the doorway. He looked past the flames and saw a woman laying on the floor, beyond her, a crib with a baby crying in it. Johnny was instantly faced with a horrible decision: save the woman and leave her baby for dead, or, save the baby and leave the woman to burn. He jumped through the flames and landed on his side, next to the woman. She was faintly breathing, too weak to cough or scream anymore. Johnny got up and dragged the woman over against the wall and covered her with his fire coat, there, she'd be safe until he could come back for her. He instantly realized that taking his flame-proof coat off, was a bad idea, once he felt the heat making sweat pour down his forehead. Johnny reached into the crib for the squalling baby and wrapped it in a blanket. He turned back to the door and felt his heart lurch when the ceiling collapsed in front of it.

"Oh no…" he trailed off.

Meanwhile, Roy was downstairs, herding people outside. "Go on! Get out of here!" he shouted at them. He coughed and squinted against the flames lapping wildly around the room. He was heading upstairs, when the whole apartment building shook with an ear-piercing explosion. He grabbed the stair railing to balance himself and waited for everything to stop shaking. Another explosion sounded, closer this time, but somewhere in one of the apartments. Several firemen came in, dragging a thick hose with them.

"Get out of the way!" one of them shouted. Roy nodded and headed upstairs.

Chet pulled the lever back on the hose, letting the pressure release and sending water spraying out at the fire. Suddenly, the flames grew taller, crackling as the water hit them. The firemen flinched back when they realized that the water was feeding the fire.

"What's going on, Pint-size?" Chet demanded, turning to one of the firemen holding the hose. "I reckon that something must be in the water!" Pint-size drawled. "But it's from _our_ truck!" Chet snapped back. "God forbid any water from your truck should be bad!" Pint-size shouted over the nose of the flames. Chet turned the water off and dropped the hose.

"I'll take a look at the readings on the truck, you hold the fort down! Try not to get yourselves killed!" he commanded.

Before Chet reached Station fifty-one's truck, Captain Stanley was already there, yelling at Mike. "Cap! Something's wrong with the water!" Chet shouted. Captain Stanley turned to him.

"That's the whole problem! This isn't water, it's Coca-Cola!" he shouted angrily.

Chet went slack-jawed. "What?" he demanded. Mike shrugged.

"I don't know how it got in there! I swear it!" he said bitterly.

Captain Stanley pulled out his fire radio with a frown. "Dispatch, this is Engine Fifty-one, we need another engine out here. Ours is out, due to mechanical trouble!" he said. "Ten-four, Fifty-one." the dispatcher replied. Captain Stanley narrowed his eyes.

"We're no good here! We can't even pour water on a stupid fire, for crying out loud!" he cursed.

On the second floor, Johnny was busy, trying to yank away the burning curtains around the only escape; a tall, narrow glass window. He was trying desperately to hold the baby in one arm while working with the other. He cursed as the flames from the curtains seared his left arm and made him grimace. He knew he needed his fire coat badly and he put the baby down, who was squalling and wrestling against the blankets that restrained it. Johnny dragged the woman under the crib and grabbed his fire coat. He hastily put it on and picked the baby up again. He was going to have to break the window in order to escape. He was about to kick the glass out, when he heard a deafening explosion.

At the same time, Captain Everett was barking out orders to a young fireman. He looked up to the apartment building and blinked against the heat. He looked up just in time to see all the windows break and rubble get shot out from every open space in the building. All the firemen standing outside, yielding hoses, shielded their faces with their arms. Through the smoke, Captain Everett could just make out someone falling from the second story window, holding tightly to something. He assumed it was suicide and ran over to investigate. When he approached the spot where the person had fallen, he was shocked to find it was none other than a fireman, holding tightly to a squirming bundle of blankets, and trying to get up. Everett knelt down and helped the fireman up.

"Gage? What just happened?" he demanded, his eyes round. Johnny Gage was shaking uncontrollably and was still gripping the bundle of blankets. Everett carefully took the bundle away from him and pulled the blankets away. A baby!

"You were just blown out of a second story window, clutching a _baby_?" Captain Everett demanded furiously. Both Johnny and the baby could have been killed.

Everett's harsh tone brought the stricken fireman back to his senses.

"There's still a lady in there! She's under the crib!" Johnny shouted. He ran past Captain Everett and back into the apartment building. Everett dropped his mouth open.

Whatever was in that smoke, must've been doing a number on poor Johnny. He was certainly crazy, going into that building again, right after falling out of it. Everett looked down at the baby and was hit with a prickle of guilt. This is exactly what his son, Timothy, had looked like before he died. He didn't want to be reminded of such a thing and looked around for somebody to hold the child.

"Here! You take him!" Everett choked out to Squad fifty-one's mascot. The furry midget took the baby, surprise lighting his eyes. Everett turned away and went back to commanding his firemen.

"Cap! You've got to get all your men out of here! This whole thing is going to collapse! Squad Ten just looked at the foundation, and it's not going to hold much longer!" Roy DeSoto informed Captain Robertson, who was directing his firemen around the falling drywall. Robertson looked at Roy and frowned.

"I know what I'm doing, DeSoto, you concentrate on commanding your own men!" the stubborn captain barked back. Roy couldn't believe his ears. He knew all too well how stubborn old Captain Bob Robertson could be, but he never thought that he would ever risk the safety of his own firemen.

"No, you listen to me! If you don't get everybody out of here, a lot of people are going to die! Johnny just went upstairs to get out the last civilian and the fire's almost out!" Roy snapped back, flinching away from the hot ashes that were flying up in his face. Captain Robertson narrowed his eyes and nodded.

"Alright then." he murmured. Louder, he shouted, "Tuhhurn! Gather up the crew and get the heck out of here! This place is going to go!" he commanded Pint-size. The fireman nodded and gestured to his crew, shoving them towards the staircase and out the building.

"And then, when the whole building collapsed, I almost fainted!" Alf said excitedly, getting out of the squad car. The ash-covered firemen were silent. They all knew how much danger Alf had put them in with his antics. Filling up the fire engine with Coca-Cola, for goodness' sakes! "And when the woman was reunited with her baby, that's when I started to tear-up." Alf continued. He noticed that nobody was responding to him and he turned around, rather confused.

"What? Didn't you think it was an incredible experience?" the alien asked, taking off his fire hat. "Oh, I'd say it was _quite_ an incredible experience." Captain Stanley said in a mock-sweet tone. Alf cocked his head.

"Okay, what did I do this time?" he asked. Captain Stanley was about to pipe up, but Roy already knew the whole story, so he cut in.

"Uh, you put Coca-Cola in the fire engine." Roy said bluntly. Johnny stepped forward, his arms crossed and a serious expression on his ash-smeared face. "And you put air freshener in our oxygen tanks." he noted.

Captain Stanley broke in. "How and why did you put soda in the engine! Do you know how long it's going to take to clean that out? All the systems will be coated with sticky residue from all that pop!" he shouted furiously. Alf didn't seem too concerned.

"Well, I called the soda guy to come give me a load of full soda bottles and I emptied them out individually into the tank. It's very convenient for me. Besides, I'm always running out of the stuff. Pop keeps you on your toes." he explained comically. All the firemen went wide-eyed. "Are you kidding me?" Chet asked in disbelief.

"I don't _believe_ you." Captain Stanley moaned.

"I'm going to get so much grief for this…" Johnny muttered. Roy nodded in agreement.

"Me too. And I don't think Mr. _Shumway_ is going to be coming with us on any more calls any time soon." he murmured. Marco shook his head sadly at Alf and looked up at Johnny.

"So, man, Everett told me that you fell two stories out of that building. Are you alright? I mean, you could've been killed." he asked sympathetically. Johnny nodded slowly.

"Um, yes. I'm fine. I just landed a little funny. That's all." he replied hesitantly.

Chet smirked. "Oh yeah? Where'd you land?" he asked. Captain Stanley frowned and flicked Chet in the back of the head for making a remark like that.

"You know where!" Johnny snapped back.

All the firemen burst out laughing. "Well, at least you didn't land on your head." Roy said, trying not to laugh. Johnny cringed and jerked away from Roy.

"Ga! You smell like a smoked ham!" he scorned. Roy's eyes went round and he tensed. "Holy smokes! I left the ham in the oven while we were gone!" he yelled. He bolted into the kitchen and ran straight into a cloud of smoke. He coughed and backed up.

"Oh, crud!" he murmured. "Turn the fan on!" he added, louder. Chet flicked the light switch on, and the overhead fan started to turn. The smoke slowly separated and Roy was able to make it to the oven. He opened it up and started coughing.

"Oh, no!" he cried when he saw the shriveled, burnt ham, blistering pitifully in the pan. Alf brushed past the firemen and caught a glimpse of the ham. He screeched and fainted. Marco caught him and raised his eyebrows.

"Dude, it's just a ham." he said dryly.

Alf put his hand over his forehead and started to pant. "Now I'm going to starve!" he groaned.

Captain Stanley put his hands up for silence.

"Okay, it's not the end of the world. We'll just order pizza." he stated with great authority. All the men agreed. Roy threw his oven mitts down on the table and cursed.

Johnny patted him on the shoulder.

"Don't worry about this, Roy. We won't hold it against you." he comforted with a grin. Roy ignored him and scowled at Alf. Alf was busy looking through the phone book, trying to find a Domino's Pizza restaurant nearby.

"I found it!" he shouted. Mike grabbed the phone book away from him and picked up the phone.

"Does anybody have any quarters?" he asked, looking around. Captain Stanley dug down into his pocket and pulled out a handful of change.

"Yeah. Here." he said, handing the mess of coins to Mike. Mike sorted the coins out and slid a few quarters into the coin slot on the phone. Alf was shaking uncontrollably.

"Hurry up! I'm going to go into labor if you don't get me a pizza, stat!" he warned. Mike flashed him a dirty look and picked up the phone. Alf waited tensely as he slid the rotary dial.

"Hello, yes, I'm fine." Mike said. He tapped his foot during the long phone conversation, while Alf was jumping up and down, trying to put his order in.

"Um, yeah. Three pepperoni pizzas. I don't know, just a sec." he put the phone on his shoulder and turned to the firemen.

"Do we want small, medium or large?" he asked. Alf piped up. "Large! Large! Large!" he shouted, drowning out the other firemen. Mike frowned at him.

"Alright." he said slowly. He lifted the phone from his shoulder and continued to talk. "Large. All of 'em. Yeah, we got cash." he replied.

Soon, the order was placed and the pizza was delivered. Alf managed to eat a whole pizza by himself, much to the dismay of Captain Stanley, who was a religious believer of, "Gluttony is a sin." But, Alf ignored his protests and wolfed the entire pizza down in one bite. He was about to make a move for the other two, but was yelled at, so he backed off and sulked for a while. When it was time to "hit the sack", Alf was assigned to the couch while the firemen had the luxury of sleeping in the dormitory. It was about a quarter until midnight when the alarm went off. Alf starting screaming bloody murder and got the fire ax out of the truck and started swinging it around wildly, thinking that he was still dreaming. It took the whole crew to calm him down and snatch the ax away.

"Alf, you don't have to go if you don't want to," Roy started, "This call is for the engine only, and I think you look a little tired." he said to the embittered alien. Alf agreed and went back to the couch. He listened to the garage door open and the fire engine racing out, then he went back to sleep.

The next day, Alf was nowhere to be found. The firemen searched everywhere, but they couldn't find him. Their only hint was an open box of Twinkies, with the filling sucked out of them and the cake left alone and shoved back into the box.

"Oh, he's going to pay for this…." Chet murmured, on his knees and clutching the mangled Twinkie box. Roy looked around and noticed that his paramedic partner was nowhere to be found either. To Roy, that wasn't a good sign. He soon found Johnny in the parking lot behind the station, digging around in the trunk of his car.

"What are you doing?" Roy asked abruptly. Johnny jumped and whacked his head on the trunk lid.

"Don't do that!" he snapped. Roy ignored him. "What are you doing and where's Alf?" he demanded. Johnny slumped his shoulders.

"If I knew that, I'd be a rich man." he mumbled. "Only God knows where that alien went, but I have a hunch." he added. Roy frowned.

"Where?" he asked. Johnny sighed and wondered how he was going to explain this. He knew all about Alf's stolen time-traveling DeLorean and how he managed to get to the seventies. He also knew that Alf still had the keys to it and if that was the case, there was no telling what could happen if he decided that he wanted to time-travel again. He remembered Alf saying that he had lost the keys and that he might've dropped them in Johnny's sports car upon his arrival, but where were they now? Had Alf found them and run off to go ruin someone else's life? Johnny felt a tinge of satisfaction at that thought, but, also fear. If Alf had time-traveled again, he could change history as they all knew it! If that was ever to happen, World War Two might not have been won, the Depression might never have ended, Ford might not have become president and who knew what else? If any Alf had changed any of that, the world would be a disaster.

_ If, if, if! _

All this was a question of Alf's tendency to get into trouble. Johnny had mixed feelings about that alien from the moment he met him. At first, he hated him, then he felt gratitude towards him, then the resentment all over again. Oh, why did Alf have to be so difficult? All this would have been made a heck of a lot easier if Alf had just told him where he parked the DeLorean. Johnny might have been able to stop him. But then again, he didn't know exactly what Alf intended to do. All this was making Johnny's head spin, and he forgot what Roy had asked him.

"I need to find Alf. Can you see if Channing or Kirk will fill in for me?" he asked. Roy looked surprised. "Well…okay." he said with a shrug.

"Thanks! Tell the captain where I went!" Johnny said, slamming the trunk to his car shut and hopping in the driver's seat.

"But this is against regulation!" Roy argued. "You have to stay here until your replacement comes. If you leave and I can't find anybody to fill in for you…." Johnny wasn't even listening. Big surprise there. He just backed his car out of the lot and sped off.

Roy stood there with his hands at his sides and an exasperated expression on his face.

Johnny parked at a haphazard angle in his driveway and jumped out of his car. He knew that this was the first place Alf would have come to before making any escape moves. Alf could've just asked Johnny if he wanted to stay home, but no, he had to have the paramedic frantically searching his house for any signs of him.

"Alf? Where are you?" he called. He tripped over the trash can, which had been upended across his kitchen floor.

"What the…?" he looked around the kitchen and saw empty boxes laying all over the place. So many things in his cabinets were missing.

Crackers, cheese puffs, soda, chips, bread and…._his cats!_

Johnny gasped and started looking for his cats. He found his cat carriers in a mess on his garage floor, and tabby fur all over the place. Yeah, there had definitely been a struggle here. Why would the alien want to steal his cats along with all his food? Hadn't cheese puffs, chips and what not, been enough? This was a disaster. Johnny's cats were on the "do not eat" list for Alf. He didn't know why Alf snacked on cats, but he didn't want to know. He then tried to think of where Alf would go after loading up on supplies. That thought made him cringe.

_ Supplies?_

His cats weren't supplies, they were animals for crying out loud! Johnny got back into his car and headed for the nearest grocery store. There were thousands of food stores in L.A., and it was impossible to tell which one Alf would head to first! The nearest one, possibly? Or maybe a pet store? This alien seemed to be on a rampage, or so he thought. He was racing through traffic and slammed on the breaks when he saw something he couldn't believe. He felt his car jerk as somebody rear-ended him. He was in too much shock to even notice.

There was Alf, sitting at a table outside of a restaurant, talking to a pair of cops. This scene didn't look good at all. Had Alf broken the law by running out in the middle of traffic, or something similar? Johnny didn't wait to find out. He parked his car on the side of the street, right outside of the restaurant. Before he walked up to Alf, he glanced at his car's bumper. It didn't look too heavily dented, so he jogged right up to Alf's table. To his amazement, Alf was laughing with the two cops and sipping on a soda. He also had a whole bag full of cheese puffs and lots of soup crackers with him. The cops were eating with him and laughing about something. Johnny reached the table and caught his breath. Reed and Malloy looked up at him, grins across their faces.

"Oh, hi there!" Reed greeted him. Johnny looked at the two cops, slack-jawed and turned to Alf. Alf had a lot of explaining to do.

"You darned son of a gun!" he cursed at Alf. "You had me searching all of L.A. for you, and you're sitting here fooling around with some cops? Do you know how much flak I'm going to get from the captain when I get back? He'll scalp both you _and_ me! Why, I have a mind to-" he was cut off by Malloy.

"Hey, now listen, buddy," he started, "This guy wasn't doing anything wrong. We were taking seven here and we ran into him. He claims that he was just on his way from a fire station and decided to take lunch here. He also says that he's an observer for the paramedic program." Reed nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, and you won't believe how hilarious he is. His cracks about the P.D. are drop-dead funny." he stated. Johnny frowned.

"This _guy _ran from the station without checking out or telling anyone, and he had me worried. Not only that, he trashed my house and stole my food and killed my cats!" he said, taking a deep breath when he was finished. The two policemen looked at Alf with stern expressions.

"Is that true?" Malloy asked, slapping his baton in the palm of his hand. Alf shrugged and stuffed another mouthful of cheese puffs into his mouth.

"Well, I wanted to have an early-morning snack, so I figured Johnny-boy here, wouldn't mind if I stopped by his house and picked up a few snacks, then headed out. I was going to come back to the station anyway, but I don't know why he had to make such a big deal about it." Johnny wanted to strangle the alien right then in there, but when there are two proffesional policemen standing right next to you, that's kind of hard to do. He grabbed Alf roughly and hauled him out of the chair.

"What about my cats? Did you snack on them too?" he demanded. Reed and Malloy looked bewildered. It was obvious to them that people didn't necessarily eat cats. Only people from China and Vietnam did that.

"Well?" Johnny asked.

Alf started laughing. "Snack on your cats? How could I? They were clinging to the ceiling so hard, I couldn't get 'em down, otherwise, yes, I might have eaten them." he explained. Malloy shook his head in confusement.

"Wait, you _eat_ cats?" he questioned. Alf was quick to think of a reply.

"You see, Johnny-boy here, I have to humor him. His antidepressants are really taking a toll on him and he says some really crazy things. But no, I don't eat cats. Why? Did you believe that for a second?" Alf asked, grinning. Malloy and Reed started to laugh a little hesitantly, but then broke out cackling in understandment. Reed nodded.

"Okay. Well, tell Johnny that he needs to lay off the pills. And to stop taking them with alcohol." he then snapped his finger at Malloy. "Say, maybe we should bring that up to Mac at the next board meeting? Being aware of the effects medication can have on you is very important." Reed suggested. Malloy nodded.

"Alright, Jim. I'll take it under advisement." the two cops tipped their hats to Johnny and Alf and walked to their patrol car.

"Well, see you, Johnny. Mr. Shumway." Malloy said, still grinning. They hopped in their car and sped off. Johnny, still grasping Alf, let go of him.

"I don't believe you told them that!" he said. Alf walked over to Johnny's car, holding all his stolen snacks.

"It was a moment of great pressing. You'd be surprised at the things that can roll off my tongue in a moment like that." with that remark, Alf sat in the passenger's seat and slammed the door shut. Johnny got in the driver's seat, not saying a single word to the alien.

When the tired fireman and the exuberant extraterrestrial had arrived at the fire station, it was already mid-day. Johnny got out of his car, followed by Alf. He was greeted by Jason Channing, an experienced visiting paramedic.

"Hello, John." he said, smiling. He then caught a glance of the little mascot and his smile faded.

"Is that who you were looking for?" Channing asked in his English accent. Johnny nodded.

"Yup," he replied flatly, "Our distracted little paramedic observer." Alf snorted rudely and stalked off to the kitchen. Channing smiled again, in his usual cheery way.

"Well, he'll learn to stay on task. Trust me, they all do." he chuckled, he then added, "Crazy Yanks."

Johnny appreciated Channing's easy going ways, but he always had a feeling of resentment when he was around him. Channing had a bad habit of picking up all of Johnny's ex-girlfriends, which was a real bummer.

"Well, thanks for filling in for me." Johnny said shortly. "How many runs did you go on?" he asked curiously.

_ And how much pay did I miss out on…_

He added silently. Channing looked thoughtful. "Five, not including the dog stuck in the cat door." he said with a hearty laugh. Johnny couldn't help but laugh. What ridiculousness!

"Well," Channing started, "I better be getting home. I promised a friend that I'd help him with his burn pile. The job of a fireman is never done!" he said with a happy sigh.

Johnny turned and walked into the captain's office.

"So, did you ever get the engine cleaned out?" he asked. Captain Stanley looked up from the pile of papers on his desk.

"Yeah. Charley came and cleaned the tank out. We filled it up with _water_ this time." the captain replied. Johnny flinched, rembering the Coca-Cola incident. "Don't worry, Mr. Shumway won't be with us much longer." he assured. Captain Stanley nodded and mumbled, "Good."

The next day was pretty pain-free, which was a blessing for Roy and Johnny, who had to drag Alf with them on all their runs. Captain Stanley strongly disapproved of all this and he never said a word to Alf, not knowing that the little comedian, was actually an alien from the planet Melmac. As far as the captain was concerned, "Mr. Shumway" was a midget dressed up in a stupid suit. Johnny was willing to let him believe that, going off the old misled saying:

"What they don't know can't hurt 'em."

When it was time for the firemen of the "A" shift to get off work, the "B" shift came in and took over. A few of the firemen made cracks about the "A" shift's mascot and pointed at him.

Alf totally ignored them and let the insults bounce right off of him. It was a lot easier than shoving the firemen's insults back down their throats.

"Oh, Gage wait," Captain Stanley started, just before handing his office over to Captain Everett.

"I want to know if your going to send your little mascot friend back to where he came from." Johnny was literally caught off guard by such a question. He didn't think it through that far. What _was _he going to do with Alf? Okay, this was going to be interesting.

"Well, I'm uh…." Johnny trailed off, "Dropping him off at his mother's house." he lied. Captain Stanley looked skeptical, but just murmured something inaudible. "Fine." harsher, the captain added, "Now hear me and hear me good; if I ever see that mascot here again or any other represenitive of any company whatsoever, I'm going to transferr you to the North Pole, do you understand?" he asked. Johnny grinned like a fox.

"Understood." he replied. "Good. Keep it that way." Captain Stanley snapped. He then turned away and headed out to his car in the parking lot.

When Alf got back to Johnny's house, he ran in and jumped on the couch. "Home at last!" he cried, tossing the pillows up. Johnny walked through the front door, only to have one of the pillows hit him in the face. He scoffed in disgust and picked it up.

"Alf, would you be more careful?" he said sharply. Alf ignored him and flicked on the T.V. "Look at this crummy reception!" Alf said disdainfully. Johnny sighed. "You've already mentioned that a billion times. You say it every time you turn it on!" he replied angrily.

Alf continued to ignore him and switched through the channels.

"Hey, make some popcorn, will you?" Alf demanded. Johnny threw his coat down on the back of the couch and walked over to the kitchen to make some popcorn. He had to get rid of Alf somehow. If only he could find a way to bring up the subject of Alf's stolen DeLorean. Then, maybe he could get Alf to time travel himself back to the eighties. When that was going to happen, was impossible to know. When Johnny finished making the popcorn, he poured two cups of melted butter on it and shook it up. Alf saw this and grinned.

"You better watch out, Johnny-boy; if you eat enough of that butter, you'll be fatter than the Stay Puft marshmallow man." Johnny rolled his eyes and sat down on the couch, next to Alf.

"Me? Fat? Never!" he declared, "I'll have you know that at one point, I was going to be a _male model._" Alf was unimpressed. "What? Did the _female_ model agency turn you down?" he asked. Johnny frowned. "That's not funny." he mumbled. Alf continued.

"Besides, what were you gonna model anyway? Gloves?"

Johnny narrowed his eyes. "_You_ better watch out, Alf. If my Indian blood boils up, I might just have to scalp you and make a tepee out of you." he said seriously. Alf cocked his head.

"Or I could make a rug. Then, when you get dirty, I can take you out and beat you." Johnny continued. Alf snatched the bowl of popcorn away from him and shoved a huge handful of it in his mouth.

"I think not." Alf replied, popcorn spilling out of his mouth and onto the freshly vacuumed floor. Johnny cringed. This alien was more and more disgusting as he got to know him better.

Meanwhile, in a dark van several blocks away…..

"I swear that I picked something up on the long-range scanners, just a few seconds ago. It's kind of fuzzy, but I think it's something legit!" a blonde-haired, blue-eyed woman said, hunching over a keyboard of controls. A tall, dark-haired man in a black suit jacket and sunglasses, came up behind her, his mouth twisted in a hard scowl.

"You said that last time, and it turned out to be a disco ball." he rumbled.

"Jack, I know I made a big mistake last time, but I have a feeling that I'm right this time." the woman persuaded. "Donna, you said it's fuzzy." the man pressed. Donna flipped her mop of wispy blonde hair back and gave him a stern look. "That's because it's a few blocks away." she replied, biting her tongue, as not to let a snippy remark slip through. Jack shook his head and headed back up to the front of the dark van. He plopped down in the driver's seat and leaned back.

"This whole idea is stupid. I got a Ph.D. from Oxford so I could hunt down green men in flying saucers. That's rich." he mumbled. Donna stood up and walked up behind him and rested her delicate hands on his stiff shoulders.

"Jack, this is a government funded program and you signed up for it, as well did I. The pay is good and we're doing it for the good of the country." she said with a grin. Jack turned his head and gave her an annoyed look through his sunglasses. "It's stupid. The only reason I signed up for it, is because I wanted to see if it was a put-on. When I learned it wasn't, and that the pay was good, I had to stay. Not because I'm doing what I like, but because it puts bread on the table. Besides, I didn't even know that there was a Department of Alien Prevention." he confided.

Donna tilted her head and gave him a sympathetic look. "That's because it's a secret. And I'm not doing it for fun either, Jack. But, you have to know I'm serious when I say I found something. Now, do you want to check it out, or don't you?" she asked.

Jack sighed and put the vehicle in gear. "Alright. But only because I like you." he agreed reluctantly. Donna smiled. "Thanks, Jack."

The van pulled up across the street from a small, two-story house with a sports car parked out front. It was dark out, but every light in the house was on. "This is the place?" Jack asked skeptically. Donna glanced back at her scanner. According to it, they were right on the dot.

"Yes, this is the place. Why don't we check it out?" she asked excitedly. This had been the first legit extraterriestrial case they'd had for a week. Jack snorted.

"Yeah, why don't we knock on the front door and ask the person if they're an alien. Real good." he murmured rudely. Donna pulled her binoculars away from her face to shoot Jack a dirty look. "I just want to be sure that this is really legit. Like you said, last time, it was a false alarm." Donna said slowly. Jack snorted again.

"And the time before that, and the time before that, and the time before that!" he muttered. Donna rolled her eyes.

"Will you just humor me? Just this once?" she asked, more like an order than a request.

Jack huffed. "Fine. Let's just do a quick scan. Then, we can-" Donna cut him off.

"No, we'll do it tomorrow. I have a better idea. I'm gonna try and find a way to meet whoever lives there, then, maybe I can find out a little bit more about them."

Jack smirked. "Yeah, so you can find out if they'll sprout green antennas and start blasting the neighborhood up with laser guns." Donna was really sick of Jack. He could be a real pain sometimes. She wished she had been assigned a different co-worker, but then, they were the only DAP unit in the whole district. "Tomorrow, we will devise a plan, but tonight, I want you to straighten out your attitude." Donna warned. She had Jack's full attention now.

"Who is _we_? You and your tapeworm? I'm going home tomorrow! I'm sick of this darned job." he spat. Donna gave him a silencing look.

"Just think, if this guy is really an alien from a different planet, we could pick up a huge lump of cash, and not to mention…" she looked back and forth and spoke in a whisper, "Lots of publicity for we DAP workers." Jack grinned. "We'd never have to work another day of our lives!" he beamed. Donna grinned.

"Now it's getting to you." she said smoothly. Jack couldn't help smiling at the thought. "This is going to be worth a lot of money." he murmured ominously.

Johnny woke up the next morning to the sound of the T.V. droning downstairs. He sighed and pulled the covers over his head to block out the sound of the Mary Tyler Moore Show theme song. He didn't even think that that show was on this early. Alf and his T.V. binge-watching. The alien had watched an entire Hogan's Heroes marathon in one night and had talked about it endlessly the next day, ruining it for Johnny, due to the fact that he hadn't seen most of the episodes. Boy, oh boy, could Alf get into trouble. He could really make some insults that stung too. Well, at least the alien wasn't running around the house, trying to eat the cats. His little adventure around the neighborhood the other day had been enough trouble to last Johnny an entire week. Johnny got up and stumbled downstairs, still bleary-eyed with sleep. The T.V. was on in the living room, but nobody was watching it. Go figure, he thought. Alf was probably eating last night's leftovers right now, not even thinking about breakfast. Johnny sighed again and walked into the kitchen. But, he was wrong; Alf was sitting at the kitchen table, doing a crossword puzzle. That was a tad bit unusual. Johnny sat down at the kitchen table and stared at Alf. Alf paid no attention to him and started murmuring something to himself. Louder he asked, "A three letter word that annoys you the most…." Johnny sniffed. "Alf." the alien looked up at him and tilted his head in confusement. "What?" he asked. Johnny frowned.

"Alf." he said again. Alf was frustrated.

"What do you want?" Johnny was equally frustrated.

"Alf! A three letter word that annoys me the most! Alf!" he shouted.

"Well, what is the three letter word?" Alf asked. Johnny sighed and sat back down. This was exasperating. He shook his head and waved Alf off. "Just…never mind. Okay?" he muttered. Alf shrugged.

"Yes, Johnny-baby." he said casually. Johnny rolled his eyes.

"Another thing," he started sternly, "Could you stop making stupid jokes and calling me Johnny-boy and Johnny-baby all the time? It's getting on my nerves!" he demanded. Alf just stared at him. "Alright." the alien then murmured inaudibly, "Johnny-baby."

"_Thank you_!" Johnny snapped at the alien. Alf looked back down at his crossword puzzle, humming some rhythmic song. Johnny raised his eyebrows.

"What're you humming?" he asked. Alf bobbed his head up and down.

"The Ghostbusters theme song." he replied.

_ Ghostbusters? _

What the heck was a "Ghostbuster?" Johnny was curious, so he asked, "What's Ghostbusters?" Alf dropped his jaw open. He then started to laugh.

"Only the most awesome movie of the eighties." he said, grinning.

"What's it about?" Johnny pressed. Alf was about to tell him, but the doorbell rang. Johnny got up and gestured for Alf to get under the table. Alf reluctantly did so and Johnny went to answer the door. Standing there, was his co-worker, Roy DeSoto.

Johnny was a little surprised that Roy had come to see him on his week off, but he invited him in anyway. Roy looked a little antsy, like he was dying to ask Johnny something, but couldn't.

"Well, come on in, Roy." Johnny said, a little confused. Roy nodded to him and walked in. He then started looking around, like he had lost his dog or something. Johnny crossed his arms.

"Um, is there something you need to ask me?" he asked. Roy stood up straight and sported his most innocent face. "Oh, no. Not at all. Say, did you paint your living room a different color?" he asked. Johnny shook his head.

"No, it's been that color ever since I moved in." he said. Roy nodded and turned around.

"Also, by the way…is…'You know who' here?" he asked in a low voice. Johnny was about to open his mouth to reply, but a voice sounded from the kitchen.

"I'm not completely deaf, you know!" came the harsh tone. Johnny huffed.

"We know, Alf." he shouted back. Roy grinned. "So, he _is_ here?" Johnny shifted his glance.

"Yeah." he mumbled. Roy patted him on the back.

"I thought you would have dropped him off at the animal shelter by now, but I can see you've grown a little attached to him." Johnny was taken aback.

"What? No! There's just one thing that's keeping me from sending him back to where he came from. I know what it is, I just don't know how to bring it up to him. I'm afraid of the reaction I might get." Johnny explained. "He might think I hate him and want to get rid of him, and that's partly true. But I can't go on like this anymore. I can't keep covering for every mistake he makes. And if I ask him where his DeLorean is, he might not tell me. I don't want to dismiss that possibility and go through with it, but I just…I'm stuck." Roy nodded slowly,

"Torn between feelings and reality." he said, "That's tough."

Johnny sighed. "I just want to find the DeLorean and get Alf back to the eighties, but if I ask him where it is, I'll hurt his feelings and he won't tell me and I'll be stuck with him forever!" he said, stating his problems all over again. He couldn't help it. This was all so nerve-racking.

Johnny then noticed the bewildered expression on Roy's face.

"Um, by the way….what's all this about a…a…DeLorean…and uh…the eighties?" Roy asked. It suddenly hit Johnny like a ton of bricks. He hadn't told Roy about Alf's journey from the future back to the seventies. Roy was looking expectantly at him. Johnny sighed again.

"You better sit down." he said in low voice.

Soon, he explained all about Alf's stolen time-traveling car and everything else. By the time Johnny was finished with his unbelievable tale, Roy was looking rather trodden on.

"I don't believe it…." he murmured. "That's just not possible." Johnny chuckled.

"You better believe it. Here he is, in the flesh and…" Johnny cast a glance over at the kitchen and gasped. "-And he's eating my cookies!" he ran over to the kitchen and snatched the empty box of cookies away from Alf. Alf burped and yawned.

"That was good." the alien grunted.

"I just got those yesterday." Johnny said unhappily, looking into the empty box and tossing it on the table. Roy widened his eyes at Alf's appetite and watched the alien pad upstairs to the guest bedroom.

"Don't worry, Roy," Johnny assured, "I'll find a way to get rid of him." Roy relaxed his shoulders and started murmured things to himself. He walked himself out of the house and to his car.

"I'll…see you later." Roy mumbled.

"Who the heck is the carrot-top that just walked out of the guy's house?" Jack asked Donna, who had just finished putting her earrings on.

"Carrot-top?" she asked, "Jack, what are you talking about?"

Jack rolled his eyes.

"If you weren't so obsessed about your appearance, you would've noticed too." he muttered unhappily, pulling the binoculars away from his face. Donna frowned at him and sat down in the passenger's seat next to him.

"I just want to make sure that this plan works. If it doesn't, we'll lose a whole lot of money." she murmured as she grabbed the binoculars away from Jack.

"And publicity," Jack piped up, "Don't forget publicity."

Now it was Donna's turn to roll her eyes. "Jack, the only reason we'll get money for this, is because the scientists we sell this alien to, are gonna pay us millions of dollars just to experiement on a live specimen. Now, what's all this about a carrot-top?" she asked. Jack pointed through the windshield at the house across the street.

"Him." Jack said bluntly, pointing at an average looking man with red hair, who was getting into a station wagon parked outside of the house. Donna frowned.

"Any idea what he was doing there?" she questioned, straightening out the top to her sleeveless red dress. Jack pursed his lips.

"No idea. But, it probably doesn't matter. Now that he's out of the way, we-, er…_you_, can go in for the kill." he explained. Donna nodded and grabbed her purse out from the bottom of her seat.

"I called Levi Dennison and asked him to park my car a couple blocks East of here. He said that he pulled a few wires, and he said that he's sure that it's something even I could fix. That way, the whole plot will be convincing." Donna explained. Jack didn't say anything, but looked at his wristwatch.

"Well, you better get going." he said with a sigh.

Donna grinned and put her hand under Jack's chin.

"Don't you worry. Everything will be fine." she crooned, as though she was talking to a baby. Jack pulled away and snorted rudely. "Go on, already." he snapped. Donna snickered and slid out of the ominous looking van.

"See you later." she called back to him as she swung her leather jacket over her shoulder and strutted smartly down the street in her tall, black high-heels.

Donna soon found her green Oldsmobile parked on the side of the street two blocks down. She lifted the hood and glanced at the engine. Well, it looked like Levi hadn't really done anything to it. She huffed and slammed the lid shut. She sure hoped that this plan was going to work. The plan was to go to the suspect's house and ask for help with her car, that way she could pry some answers out of him. She didn't even know if it was a him. For all she knew, _he_ was a seventy year-old lady and Donna had put her dress on for nothing. She trotted back up the street and walked up the front steps of the suspect's house. Gosh, the things she did for her job, she thought. She knocked on the door and flipped her hair back, her jacket still over her shoulder. Donna thought that she heard scuffling inside the house and some whispers, but she couldn't be sure. So, she knocked again and sighed. This was probably going to take forever.

Suddenly, the door opened and there was her suspected extraterrestrial. She was taken aback a tad bit when she saw the suspect. This was not what she was expecting. The suspect was about six-foot one, maybe three inches and he looked a little uneasy. He looked young, maybe in his early twenties, Donna guessed. His skin was tan, his eyes were dark and his hair was black. She was expecting a short, green, big-headed alien with huge black eyes and a tiny mouth with enormous frog-like hands. Donna broke the awkward silence and let out a little laugh.

"Hi, I'm Donna Blake, my uh…my car…it broke down a couple blocks down from here and I was wondering if you could help me. Nobody else on this street was home and I…I'm kind of stupid when it comes to fixing automobiles." she stammered. Well, he could be an alien with some cloaking device that made him look like a human. She wanted to burst out laughing at such a thought, but she kept a straight face.

The suspect glanced back into the house and then forced a grin at Donna.

"Um, now?" he asked quietly. Donna raised an eyebrow.

"Well, I mean…you don't have to…but I thought it was worth a try." she was about to turn around and go tell Jack that the long-range scanners had picked up a fluke, but the suspect's eyes suddenly lit up.

"Wait!" he blurted out, "I can help you. I was just taken off guard, that's all." he explained. Donna nodded. "Let me get my toolbox!" the suspect said, trotting over to his garage and disappearing inside. Donna watched him go and waited for him to come out. While she was waiting, she reached into her purse, pulled out her portable radio and yanked the antenna up.

She looked around cautiously, to make sure no one was watching.

"Jack," she whispered into it, "I"ve found the suspect and phase two of the plan is coming into place." there was a brief silence and then Jack replied, "Roger that, don't foul up."

Donna pushed the antenna down and shoved the radio back into her purse. Soon, the suspect came back, holding a tool box. "We can use my car to get over there." he offered.

"Sure," Donna replied, "Thanks." she followed the suspect as he pulled open the passenger's side door to his sports car. He helped her in and then got into the driver's seat.

There was another period of awkward silence as they drove down the street to Donna's car. She again broke the silence and asked, "Um, you never did tell me your name." the suspect's eyes went round and he laughed nervously.

"Oh, um…sorry 'bout that." he apologized. He glanced over at her briefly and then back at the road. "I'm uh…John-er, Johnny Gage. I work as a paramedic for the fire department." he explained hesitantly, then extending his hand to shake. Donna grinned and grabbed his hand in a shake. "No kidding?" she asked. "I have a brother who works for the department." she beamed. "Oh really?" Johnny asked, "What's his name?"

"Wyatt Blake." Donna said.

"Wyatt? Oh, yeah. I've talked with him a couple times. He's a great guy. Always very responsible." the suspect replied with sudden ease. Donna frowned. This was confusing. This suspected alien seemed like a perfectly normal person. There wasn't a trace of strangeness anywhere. She felt her heart sink, realizing that she must've been wrong again. Jack would be so ticked off, it was embarrassing. Here she was, leading this guy on, making him think that her car had broken down, when it hadn't and questioning him like a prisoner. Donna felt so bad, that she wanted to cry, but she was afraid that her mascara would run.

The car suddenly jerked to a stop and Donna lurched forward, realizing that she had forgotten to strap on her seatbelt. Her hands hit the dahsboard and she gasped. Johnny grabbed her arms gently and helped balance her.

"Sorry again. I really need to ease on the brake." he said sympathetically. Donna choked out a laugh. "I really need to learn to wear my seatbelt from now on." she chuckled. Johnny grinned. "Yeah, that would help too." he joked. He then got out of the car and headed over towards Donna's Oldsmobile. She walked up behind him, rather nervously.

She watched Johnny as he glanced at the engine. He snorted and reached his arm down inside. He frowned and scrambled around for something. He then yanked up a large piece of cloth. It was looked like it had once been white, but was now black with smudges and torn to shreds; it looked to be some lacey curtain.

Johnny burst out laughing and threw it on the sidewalk.

"Well, someone was messing with your car, no doubt about that." he noted, "That curtain was caught in your fan belt. Just a little jammed, that's all. It should run now." he chuckled. Donna wanted so badly to slap Levi. He had thrown a _curtain _in the engine. That was so lame. She shook her head.

"Thanks, Johnny. Sorry I bothered you." she apologized. Johnny shrugged and slammed the lid shut.

"No problem. It's always a pleasure to help a lovely lady." he said with a slight grin.

Donna laughed.

"Lovely? Now that's something I haven't been called since high school."

Johnny grabbed a hankerchief out of his pocket and wiped his hands off.

"Who said that you had to be in high school to be complemented?" he asked. Donna tilted her head. "That's true." she replied, "Well, thanks again. It was nice meeting you and I appreciate you helping me with my car." she took in a breath and glanced up the street. The van was nowhere to be seen and Jack had probably already headed back to his house with no regard to the plan. She let her breath out and reached into her purse.

"Um..by the way…," she said shakily, writing down her number on a piece of crumpled paper, "Here's my number…if you want to…you know… call me some time." she handed it to Johnny and watched his astonished expression.

"Great." he beamed. He took her pen and grabbed a piece of paper out of his pocket. He rested it on the hood of her car and wrote his number down. He gave it to her and shoved his hands in his pockets. Donna nodded stiffly and threw her hair back.

"See you later." she said, hopping into her car and starting it up.

_That had nothing to do with the plan_, she thought. She knew if Jack found out about this, she'd be in real trouble. But…maybe this could work out. She could keep in touch with the suspect and find out more about him, taken the fact that she was too scared to pry any serious questions out of him. She sighed and drove her car home. She'd call Jack when she got there and let him know how it went. Donna tried her best to keep business aside from personal feelings, but that would be a neat trick…if anybody could do it. She had no idea why she had handed the suspect her number. Not her business number, no, her home number. She winced at that thought. And why did she keep thinking of him like a _suspect_? Donna was so mixed up, that she just closed the whole ordeal out of her mind until she arrived back home.

When she got back to her house, she ran right to the phone and called Jack.

He picked up after the third ring and muttered, "Hello?"

Donna took in another deep breath.

"Jack, it's Agent Lane." she said quietly.

Jack snorted. "When did we start up with all this 'agent' crap?" he asked, taking a sip out of his beer bottle as he watched a Bronco player tackle a Cubs player and grab the football on his small T.V. set. Donna scowled, wishing Jack could see her face, then maybe he'd know how serious this whole thing was.

"I got the suspect's number." she hissed impatiently.

Jack yawned. "And how is that supposed to help us?" he asked.

"It'll help me keep in touch with him, so I can find out if he really is an extraterrestrial." Donna snapped back. Jack nodded slowly.

"Good work. I told the DAP committee about our find and they're pretty impressed. They say that if we can provide some solid evidence within a month, we can get a warrant and arrest this guy." he explained. Donna couldn't help but smile.

"Thanks. I'll do my best to pry some information out of him." she replied. Jack yawned again.

"This is going to be some easy money. One alien for enough dough to last us our entire lifetimes." he said smoothly.

"Exactly," Donna said, "Tomorrow, I'm going to call our suspect and make a time to meet him. Don't worry about a thing. I'll have him in cuffs before you can say UFO."

Johnny was sitting across from Alf at the dinner table, trying not to watch him slurp up his spaghetti and see it slap the alien's mouth and send sauce flying in all directions.

"So, what happened with that chick, ealier today?" Alf asked.

Johnny looked up at him.

"Her car was fine. Just a problem with the belt." he replied.

Alf looked like he didn't buy it.

"What else?" he asked, grinning. Johnny rolled his eyes.

"She gave me her number and then she left." he mumbled. Alf perked his ears up and leaned forward on the table.

"Do I sense love in the air?" he asked. Johnny frowned at him.

"Shut up, snout-face." Alf walked over to the kitchen and ran his paws under the faucet. He then put his hands together and squished them, making kissing noises.

Johnny snorted.

"You just don't quit, do you?" he questioned. Alf shrugged. "I'm a very active person."

"Yeah, I could tell." Johnny shot back. Alf sat back down and tipped the plate of spaghetti towards his mouth and let it all pour in. He burped and licked his lips.

"You know what? You've been a single man for too long." Alf started.

Johnny sighed and rested his chin in the palm of hand.

"You've already told me that." he grumbled.

Alf then grabbed Johnny's plate of spaghetti and started eating it. He took a breath when he was done and leaned back in his chair.

"You know, Kate and Willie Tanners' daughter, Lynn? I'm sure she'd like to meet you some time." Alf stated casually. Johnny scoffed at him.

"Would you stop trying to get me to date someone? I'm sure the right one will come around," he explained. He then added, "Eventually." Alf laughed and then put on a serious face.

"You'll be dead when the right one comes around. You can't wait! There's a billion women in this world and you want to wait! You're a real sucker. In fact, you're a ditz, a loser, a geek, a nimrod _and_ a loser. Did I say loser already?" Alf scorned. Johnny grabbed his cloth napkin, dipped it in his water glass and wrung it as tightly as he could. Once he had enough tension, he let one end go and the wet napkin hit Alf in his nose. The alien jerked backwards, rubbing his snout. "Okay, I get the message!" he said in a nasally voice.

Johnny sat back and crossed his arms. He couldn't help but laugh.

"Who is the loser now?" he asked. Alf snorted and yanked the table cloth off the table, letting all the dishes and food spill onto Johnny's lap.

"What the-?" he yelled, looking at his ruined clothes. Before he could curse at Alf, the alien was running up the stairs, cackling as he went. Johnny scowled.

"You idiot!" he shouted after the alien.

The next day, Johnny got a phone call from the woman he had helped the day before. She had talked to him for a long time, with Alf listening in. Johnny had set up a date with her, much to the dismay of Alf, who didn't like being left home alone, due to the fact that the alien worried that the killer from Psycho would catch him. Johnny had assured him that everything would be alright. Alf had watched horror movies the entire night while Johnny was gone. The paramedic didn't get back until eleven-thirty and he looked a little stoned. Alf had laughed him to a scorn as Johnny had totally ignored him and headed off to bed with a dreamy expression on his face. The day after that, he woke up with no idea about what had happened the night before and was disoriented for a time. Soon, Johnny was disappearing more and more, with Alf being left home more and more. It seemed for a while that, Johnny had forgotten all about finding the stolen DeLorean and was totally wrapped up in his new romance. Alf was feeling rather neglected and started shunning the paramedic whenever he got home from his shift at the fire station. Not to mention that Alf was getting sick of Johnny humming Sweet Caroline every spare minute of his time off from work. Alf's impatience was quickly reaching an explosive climax and he hoped that Johnny's girlfriend would dump him soon. But one night, Johnny's girlfriend came over to his house. Alf was ordered to hide under the table until the two left, making the poor alien very upset. He dearly hoped this whole ordeal would end soon. Maybe Johnny finding "the one" wasn't such a great idea.

"I've got him right where I want him, Jack." Donna said over her portable radio, sitting in Johnny's car, waiting for him. "Have you found out anything useful?" Jack demanded.

"Our deadline is running out and the DAP is getting antsy. They're starting to think that we're putting them on and that we found nothing." Donna sighed.

"Jack, Johnny's taking me to meet some of his friends tonight and I think that maybe they'll know something about him. You know, if he's an extraterriestrial or not."

Jack huffed.

"For your sake, Donna, he better be. If he's not, I'll see that you get fired and lose your liscense." Donna gasped. "Jack, you wouldn't!" she cried. Jack signed off and Donna sat frozen with despair. She glanced out the car window, and saw Johnny locking his house up for the night. He walked down the steps to the car and got in the driver's seat.

"Alright, I've locked the house up, so everything should be fine while I'm gone." he said. Donna nodded. "It's nice of you to take me out so late tonight. You know, you don't have to do this. I feel like such a burden." she said earnestly. Johnny shook his head.

"I'd do most anything for you." he said nonchalantly. Donna smiled.

"Well, let's get going. I want to get to the hospital before Dr. Brackett leaves. I really want you to meet him. He's a great guy. He's probably the best heart surgeon in the city." Johnny said, backing the car out of his driveway and speeding off. Donna realized that she was still grasping her portable radio. She suppressed a horrified yelp and discreetly shoved it back into her purse. Thank goodness Johnny hadn't noticed, otherwise she'd of had a lot of explaining to do. Donna felt so rotten, using this poor fireman for her dirty deeds. Well, it wasn't dirty. It was just a way to make money, yeah that was it. She felt so torn. She hoped that Johnny was an extraterriestrial, so that she could turn him in, keep her job and make a quick buck. But, she also sincerely hoped that he _wasn't _an extraterrestrial. She liked him so much, she'd hate to see him get mangled by some half-crazed scientists who wanted to experiement on a live alien. But, if he wasn't an alien, Donna would lose her job, due to this possibly being her millionth false alarm. Johnny pulled the car up to the Rampart Emergency Hospital parking lot and helped Donna out. She followed him through the emergency receiving doors and up to the head nurse's station. A dusky-blonde haired nurse with blue eyes looked up from her clipboard with a warm smile.

"Oh, hi Johnny. Who's this?" she asked. Johnny grinned.

"Dix, this Donna Lane, a friend of mine," he started, he then turned to Donna, "And Donna, this is Dixie McCall, the head nurse here at Rampart." Donna noded and extended her hand for Dixie to shake. The two shook hands and Dixie glanced up at Johnny.

"Get sick of your own cooking?" she asked with a grin.

Donna and Johnny both laughed. Johnny then said innocently, "No, I would never make her slave over a hot stove. But, maybe she would make _me _slave over a hot stove?" he turned to Donna. Donna snickered.

"The next time you eat the rest of my low-calorie cookies, yes, I will." she laughed. Dixie shook her head, still smiling.

"You better watch out for him honey," she started, "You're playing with fire." Johnny gave her a mock-scornful look. "How would you know? Besides, Donna's not playing with fire, she's playing with the fire_fighter_." he said. Donna nodded.

"This is true." she added.

Suddenly, Dr. Brackett walked out of a treatment room, his hands in the pockets of his lab coat. Johnny saw him and gestured for him to come over.

"Hello, Johnny," Dr. Brackett said in his smooth, deep voice. "I'd like you to meet a friend of mine." Johnny said. Soon, Donna was introduced to the handsome doctor and found herself laughing at several at his flip remarks. He seemed so professional, but still easy-going. She was then introduced to a couple other doctors and nurses. Donna was delighted to meet so many people, taken that fact that she was a social butterfly. When she had met more people than she could count, Dr. Brackett and Dixie invited her and Johnny for a cup of coffee in the staff break room.

Meanwhile, Jack was dosing off to sleep in the van, his sunglasses hanging crooked on the bridge of his nose. He was awakened by the steady beep of the longe-range scanners. He got up and headed to the back of the vehicle. He glanced at the scanner screen to see a little red dot, flashing on and off. The suspect wasn't in his house, but the scanners were still detecting an alien life form. Jack scoffed. This scanner was a piece of crud. He checked the other scanner on the dashboard and found that it also was detecting an alien life form. Jack narrowed his eyes and frowned. This needed to be investigated. He was about to get out of the van, but a thunderclap sounded and rain started pouring down. He cursed and flopped back down in the driver's seat.

Back at the hospital, Donna and Johnny were getting ready to leave. They said goodbye to Dr. Brackett and Dixie and headed out to Johnny's car. They ducked against the rain, but before they reached the car, Donna gasped.

"Johnny, I left my purse in the break room. Could you go get it?" she asked. Johnny nodded. "Alright, you wait here, I'll be right back." he trotted back into the hospital and went into the break room. He spotted her purse on the coffee table and he grabbed it. Johnny heard something drop down on the ground with a heavy thump. He looked to see that the purse wasn't zipped up and something had fallen out of it. He crouched down to pick it up and saw that it was a portable radio. He frowned and looked at it.

"What the hell…?" he mumbled. He picked up some credit cards and ID cards that had fallen out and he glanced at them. One especially caught his eye. It was a liscense for the DAP. He looked closer and saw the meaning in small print.

_ Department of Alien Prevention?_

It suddenly hit Johnny like a lightning bolt in the middle of a flat field. Donna was an alien prevention agent who had been_ using _him. Using him to get to…Alf. Oh, no. This wasn't good. He had to find out if she knew anything. Johnny didn't think that he had given anything away to let her know that he had been sheltering an extraterrestrial. He quickly ran back out in the pouring rain and saw Donna standing outside of his car. She was waiting very patiently. Johnny huffed and stormed over to her. She turned around and her face brightened when she saw him.

"You forgot to unlock the car before you left, so I kind of got wet." she said sweetly.

Johnny sported a kind smile.

"That's not important right now. We need to talk." he said, slipping his arms around her waist. "About what?" Donna chuckled nervously.

"Oh," Johnny sighed, "About you. Your pretty eyes. Your pretty face. Your pretty arm…" he broke off and gently grabbed her arm. He lifted her hand up and kissed it. Donna smiled. "Which would be a shame to break!" Johnny growled. Suddenly, Johnny whipped her around and slammed her body up against the side of his car. Donna yelped as he yanked her arm behind her back as tightly as he could.

"Johnny, what are doing?" Donna demanded, rain plastering her hair to her forehead. Johnny tightened his grip on her arm.

"I want to know just who you are and who you are working for." he snapped, more innocently, he added, "No wait, I already know; _Agent Lane_."

Donna gasped. She then relaxed and closed her eyes. "I figured you'd find out sooner or later." she sighed. Johnny cringed, rain still pouring down and soaking him to his skin.

"I can't believe you _used_ me. You _knew_ I was sheltering an alien and you _used _me to get to him! Thank God I found out before you laid your filthy hands on him." Johnny spat.

Donna laughed and then started crying, her mascara running.

"I thought _you _were the alien. I had no idea you were _sheltering _an alien. This is absurd!" she cried. Johnny was taken aback. Now he wished he that he hadn't metioned the part about sheltering an alien. Sometimes he felt like such an idiot.

"I don't believe you. You thought _I _was an alien? How could you even suspect such a thing? Everything we had was so real! You betrayed me! From the very start, you planned this!" he choked out. Donna winced at his words.

"I'm sorry, Johnny. I love you, but….I had to decide which was more important. My job and my life….or my love for you and your feelings." she said, trembling with the effort of telling the horrible truth.

Johnny frowned. "Well, then I guess that this proves that the odds were always against me." he said bitterly.

"I'm sorry." Donna choked out. Johnny grabbed her and threw her on the ground. She landed in a large rain puddle. "Go home." he growled. He then got into his car and slammed the door. Somehow, Johnny knew that she was to good to be true. Donna was the only girl that he had ever met that had seemed for real, but had turned out to be a traitor. Donna got up from the rain puddle and yanked the driver's door open.

"Wait, Johnny!" she cried, "I want to help you!" Johnny scowled at her.

"You've helped me enough already!" he snapped back.

Donna grabbed his shoulders and looked at him straight.

"Would you listen to me?" she demanded. "If what you said is true about you sheltering an alien, I'm going to assume that he's still at your house?" Johnny nodded stiffly.

"Well, if that's the case, then Jack, my DAP partner, might have already picked up a signal, coming from your house. If that happens, he'll get to the alien before you can protect him!" she explained. Johnny raised an eyebrow. She had a partner too? What next? All this treachery was unbelievable, and now Donna wanted him to trust her all over again. She must've thought that he was a darned idiot.

"Am I supposed to believe you?" he asked harshly. Donna stood up straight.

"If that alien means anything to you, or if I ever meant anything to you, yes. You better believe it." she replied just as harsh. Johnny put both his hands on the steering wheel and huffed. "Get in. We need to get back to my house before your partner captures Alf." Donna ran to the other side of the car and got in. She buckled herself in and looked at Johnny.

"Alf? Is that what his name is?" she asked. Johnny started the car up.

"I'll tell you everything on the way." he sighed.

Back in the DAP van, the endless beeping of the scanner was driving Jack crazy. He decided that if he didn't investigate now, he'd never get around to it. He snorted and pulled his trench coat up over the sides of his face. Jack ducked against the falling rain and ran across the street to the suspect's house. He splashed through the rain puddles and trotted up the front steps. He jiggled the door handle and grunted when he realized it was locked. This was an important task he had to complete and of course, the entire house was locked. That was real convenient, Jack thought. He went to the side of the house and found the kitchen window. He pulled his coat sleeve up over his fist and punched the window out. He hoped that no neighbors had heard the shattering of the window. Jack cleared the remaining glass away and crawled through the small window. He lowered his feet in first and then jumped through. He landed haphazardly in the sink and whacked his head on the window sill. He cursed and climbed out of the sink. He shook himself off, sending rain droplets splattering all over the kitchen floor. Jack suddenly heard footsteps coming down the stairs. He quickly yanked out his 38. caliber revolver and pointed it towards the stairway. A furry, brown, something-or-other, poked it's head downstairs and widened it's eyes.

"Who are you?" it asked. Jack's mouth dropped open. His mind went blank and his arms went to his sides. Was this the alien that had showed up so many times on the scanner? If so, it was one weird looking alien. But, then again, nobody ever said aliens were winners in the looks department.

"Well, are you going to stand there gaping, or are you going to tell me who you are?" the alien asked again. Jack blinked several times through his sunglasses and cleared his throat. He then got himself into an attack position with his revolver in his right hand.

"Alright, come down those stairs nice n' easy with your hands up!" Jack commanded.

The alien snorted rudely.

"So, this is what you do to a guy? Break into his house through his kitchen window and shove a gun in his face? I wouldn't call _that _the American dream." the alien mumbled.

Jack was too awestruck to speak. This _thing_ was really talking to him. Speaking; in English! Jack gestured for the alien to come down farther. The furry creature came down the stairs all the way and turned around, waiting for cuffs to be put on him.

"I bet you don't even have a warrant!" the alien scorned. Jack scowled and yanked a folded piece of paper out his pocket. He held it up and it unfolded.

"Signed and sealed." he snapped. The alien grunted.

"Why do you want _me_ for? Sure, I've made a few wrong moves in my life, but I never thought it would come to this! Some jerk ushering me about in my own home, flaring a warrant for my arrest around like a winning lottery ticket!"

Jack ignored the embittered alien's protests and grabbed onto his furry arm rather roughly.

The alien struggled and yelped, but Jack continued out the door. He raced over to the van and threw the alien in.

"Sit still back there, or I'll put a whole pot full of lead into your head!" Jack snarled as he started the van up. The alien chuckled.

"You were a poet and you didn't even know it!" he stated in mock-astonishment.

Jack turned on the windsheild wipers and looked out the window. He gasped when he saw the suspect's sports car pull up into the driveway. Donna and the suspect got out and ran into the house. Less than a minute later, they ran back out with horror-stricken faces. He saw Donna point to the van and the suspect follwed her gaze. They both frowned and headed over. Jack came back to his senses and pulled out of his parking spot on the street. There was no doubt that they were going to try to stop him. Jack couldn't let that happen. This had to be done. This alien had to be brought to the police immediately. Jack heard the tires squeal as he made a wild turn. He looked in the rearview mirror and saw Donna and the suspect getting back into the sports car. They backed out of the driveway and sped after him. Jack slammed the petal to the floor and whipped the van around quiet street corners, windshield wipers going full-blast. He nicked a few parked cars' bumpers, but kept up his speed. He heard the alien sliding around in the back.

"Where did you get your license?" the creature demanded.

Jack ignored him and headed down a tree-lined street. He neglected to read the sign that read: CONTRUCTION AHEAD. USE DETOUR.

Jack soon realized his mistake when he slammed on the breaks, just inches away from some orange-and-white striped contruction barriers. He thought as quickly as he could and yanked the alien out of the van. He held the squirming creature under his arm and ducked under the flimsy barriers. He splashed through huge puddles of water and pulled the ajar lid off a manhole.

"Get in there!" Jack hissed. "We can make it downtown if we follow the underground street drains." the alien didn't reply, but quickly climbed down the ladder. Jack followed and pulled the lid over the manhole. He dropped down from the ladder and the thump of his shoes echoed around the endless tunnels. Water dripped heavily from the ceiling and flickering lights made it hard to see. The alien's eyes went round as he looked around. Jack took in the scene himself, staring at the tall ceiling and the wide river of water. There were raised cement pathways on either side of the deep, flowing river and vile trash was visible through the murky, putrid water. He heard the scuttling claws of countless rats echoing around the tunnel walls. Jack suddenly heard the squealing of tires above them and he quickly grabbed the alien.

Johnny slammed on the brakes of his car and he pushed open the driver's door. Donna got out and they both ran through the rain towards the DAP van. Donna made it to the van first and gave an exasperated sigh. Johnny came up behind her, catching his breath.

"What?" he demanded. Donna looked at him, her eyebrows creased in a concerned frown. "They're not in here." she said in an alarmed voice. Johnny cursed and looked away. He caught a glance of rain-filled footprints beyond several construction barriers and when he looked closer….a pair of large…Alf footprints. He gasped and turned to Donna. He grabbed her arm and jerked her forward.

"Look! They lead that way!" Johnny said sharply.

Donna widened her eyes.

"Into the manhole." she murmured.

Johnny grabbed one of the barriers and threw it aside, rage driving him forward. Donna followed him and helped him lift off the manhole cover. Johnny jumped down into the darkness first and caught Donna as she jumped down after him. He put Donna down and stood up straight. He went slack-jawed when he took in the scene in front of him. Across from him and Donna, stood Jack Blake, his right arm wrapped around the neck of Alf and his left arm extended, grasping a 38. caliber revolver. Donna turned around and gasped.

"Jack!" she screamed. Jack frowned.

"SHUT UP!" he screamed. He put his finger on the trigger as he pointed it at her. Johnny stepped in front of her. He had dealt with enough of these situations in his years of being a paramedic to know how to handle with this. The sympathetic go-through always seemed to work whenever Roy did it. "Jack, put the gun down." Johnny said firmly, stepping into the murky water and slowly reaching out his hands to grab the revolver. Jack aimed the gun over Johnny's shoulder and pulled the trigger. An ear-piercing explosion rang out around the dark tunnels. Johnny flinched and Donna screamed as the bullet ricocheted off the ladder behind them.

"Just give me the alien!" Johnny snapped, clearly at the end of his rope. Jack scowled.

"No! do you know how long I've been waiting for a break like this?" Jack shouted. "I"ve been on this freaking job for too long without a single success to let this slip by!" Johnny was about to call Jack some foul name, but Donna stepped forward.

"Jack, please! You can't take him to the DAP! He belongs to a family!" she pleaded, rain dripping on her head and running down her face.

"I don't give a damn about his family!" Jack retorted. Johnny relaxed his shoulders. This had to end somewhere.

"Fine. Take him." Johnny said, "We'll go home and leave you alone." Alf's eyes went wide with alarm and Donna gave him a questioning look. Johnny winked at her, to let her know that that wasn't exactly the plan. They'd just let Jack get away, and then secretly follow him, like the cops or the cowboys always did in the movies. Jack just threw his head back, laughing hysterically.

"Do you really think that I'm gonna leave you here and let you get away and tell the police that I broke into your house and then threatened you with a gun? No! I have to silence you, by blowing you to hell!" Jack shouted, tightening his grip on the trigger. But before Jack could kill anyone, Alf chomped on the DAP agent's arm. Jack screamed in pain, pulling the trigger. Another explosion rang out. Johnny took advantage of the distraction and jumped on Jack. The two fell in the deep water, wrestling for life. Donna watched on helplessly. Alf climbed out of the water and shook himself off. She saw Jack and Johnny surface, scrabbling for the gun that was in Jack's hand. Johnny was trying desperately to free the revolver from Jack's hand, but that was nearly impossible when the agent was trying to shoot him. The gun went off again and they both fell back down into the water.

They resurfaced once more, sopping wet. Jack's teeth were gritted and Johnny's mouth was twisted in a scowl of concentration. Johnny had the gun in Jack's hand twisted back to the agent's neck. Jack made one last attempt to shoot Johnny, but the gun went off while it was still pointed at the agent's neck. Donna screamed when she saw blood stream into the murky water. Johnny loosened his grip on Jack and let him fall. The water started to turn scarlet red and Johnny stood there with a horror-stricken face. He hadn't meant to kill Jack. He just wanted to get the gun away from him.

Donna jumped into the water and lifted her friend's body onto the cement. She cradled his head and grabbed his arm, feeling for a pulse. Johnny got out of the water and knelt down beside her.

"Donna…I'm…I-I'm sorry." he stammered, lost for words.

Blood still streamed from the wound in Jack's neck, making a puddle around Donna. She buried her head in his chest and started sobbing uncontrollably. Johnny suddenly realized that he was still holding the revolver. He held it by the barrel and kept it as far away from himself as possible, as though it was going to infect him. He dropped it on the cement and listened to the clatter of it falling, echo around the tunnels.

"Darn it, Johnny! Do something! You're a paramedic, aren't you?" Donna shouted.

Johnny grabbed her shoulder and tried to look her in the eye.

"He's dead, Donna." he said solemnly. Donna looked away, her eyes glistening with tears. "Jack was always overly ambitious, but I never thought that it would… lead to… this." she choked out. Alf had stood there watching the whole time, to shocked for words. Johnny frowned and turned to Alf.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Call an ambulance, or the police or something!" he snapped. Alf scoffed.

"Oh, right. Like I'm supposed to go over to some stranger's house and ask to use their phone. Good one. I wonder what they'll think when they see a furry alien using their land-line." Alf explained, rather rudely. Johnny gritted his teeth. He'd forgotten for a second that Alf was an alien, but he didn't like being reminded of it.

"Fine." Johnny growled, "I'll do it myself." he got to his feet and climbed back up the ladder through the pouring rain. Alf saluted the paramedic.

"Aye, aye, Little Red Hen!" he said jokingly. Donna flashed the alien a dirty look.

This was not the time for games. Her best friend was dead and she was soaked with blood. This was absolutely not funny.

Johnny climbed out of the manhole and hauled himself to his feet. He tripped a couple times, from the slippery pavement and his nerves of tissue paper. He was still shaking from the thought of killing a man. It just wasn't possible; Johnny was a paramedic, he was supposed to save lives, not take them. Soon, he found a house with the lights on. He guessed that somebody must've been home, so he trotted up the front steps and knocked. Right when he hit his fist on the door he gasped. Agonizing pain shot up his arm, almost making him scream in pain. He tried catching his breath and knocking again, but his arm hurt to much. He grasped it and leaned up against the door. Why did it hurt so bad? Johnny opened his eyes against the pain and glanced at his arm. It was covered in blood and throbbing like mad. It suddenly hit him about what happened. He'd been shot by one of Jack's bullets! The heat of the fight must've deafened his senses for pain, because he hadn't noticed it until now. Johnny soon wished that he hadn't noticed at all, trying to bear up against the awful pain. He used his left arm to knock instead and waited in the rain until an elderly woman answered the door. She screamed when she saw his arm and his shirt covered in blood.

"I need to use your phone." Johnny managed to gasp out. "A man's been killed and I need the police." the woman nodded stiffly and ushered him in. Johnny picked up the ridiculous-looking orange phone with his left hand and positioned it between his shoulder and ear. He then swished around the rotary dial and waited for a response.

"Did the police finish their report on what exactly happened?" Dixie asked, helping Dr. Brackett wipe all the blood off Johnny's arm.

"Yeah, I think so, I just need to sign it." Johnny grunted, his muscles rigid, waiting for the pain to ease. Dr. Brackett knew what he was doing, but he sure was quiet about it.

"I've almost got it, just don't move." Dr. Brackett mumbled, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration.

"You could've given me some morphine, you know? To ease the pain?" Johnny muttered disdainfully. "After all the injuries you've received, this is the first time I've ever heard you ask for a pain-killer." Dixie said incredulously. Johnny mouthed her words with an indignant face. Dixie pretended she didn't notice and continued to watch Dr. Brackett.

"Alright, I got it." Dr. Brackett said with a sigh, standing up straight and relaxing his shoulders as he dropped the blood-smeared bullet in a metal tray. He handed his intricate medical tools to Dixie and she wrapped them in a sterile cloth and put them back on the tray.

"You're going to need stitches, so hang in there." Dr. Brackett said with a slight smile.

Johnny snorted. "Oh great." suddenly, Roy came into the treatment room, looking like he had just seen a ghost. His tense expression didn't ease when he saw that Johnny was in the process of being stitched up.

"What happened? I heard you got shot or something?" Roy asked. Dixie nodded mildly.

"Yes. Our Class A trouble-maker and victim of circumstance got himself in a prediciment once more." Johnny twisted his lip in annoyance.

"I can't help it if I'm always in the wrong place at the wrong time, doing the wrong thing. I was born with a rain cloud over my head." he explained, jerking his arm up.

"Youch!" he yelped. Dr. Brackett huffed. "That is why I asked you to sit still. You know, so I don't stab you with the needle?" he grumbled ungraciously. Johnny rolled his eyes.

"I feel like I'm being tailored for a new suit that I can't afford." he said jokingly, trying not to let the pain of killing someone take over.

"Don't worry, Johnny," Dixie started, "I think Dr. Brackett's prices are fairly reasonable. Don't you Kell?" Dr. Brackett smirked, but didn't look up from his precision work. "Well, at least they would be, if I _was_ a tailor."

"Tell me it isn't just me," Roy said, "But do you guys seem like you don't really care that Johnny got shot?" Dr. Brackett pursed his lips.

"That's to be expected. Anybody in the medical profession has a very keen way of keeping a poker-face. A.K.A., me." Dixie nodded in agreement.

"They don't get much better than Kell." she said, hanging up an IV bottle and preparing to jab Johnny with it's needle. Johnny jerked away.

"I don't need any intravenous fluids. I'm perfectly fine!" he argued. Dixie narrowed her eyes in annoyance. "I thought that you were a paramedic?" she asked coolly.

"Well, if you just figured that out, I'd say that you've got a very serious problem." Johnny retorted, wincing as Dixie jabbed him with the needle and taped it down to his arm.

"If you jerk around to much, like you like to do, it'll come loose and you'll have a mess on your hands." she informed him. Johnny gave an exasperated sigh. "Yes, nurse."

"So exactly, what happened?" Roy asked. Johnny shifted his glance.

"Um, it's a long story and I can't talk about it in front of Dixie and Brackett." at the mention of their names, Dixie and Dr. Brackett gave Johnny a surprised look. "I just can't tell you. It would be too much for your comprehesion." Johnny replied apologetically.

"Too much for _my_ comprehesion?" Dixie asked hotly, "Johnny, what is your problem?" Johnny smirked. "Lack of pain-killers." he said jokingly, not caring if he made any sense at all. Dixie wasn't amused at all.

"Fine," Dr. Brackett cut in, "I'll have Dixie administer some MS, then will you be happy?" he demanded, still not looking up from his work.

"Thank you, that would make me very happy." Johnny sighed, very exasperated. "This drug is going to make you feel a little stoned, just a warning." Dixie murmured as she administered the pain-killer through the IV.

"By the way, can I just say that there is really something wrong with you?" Dixie asked, shaking her head in pity . Johnny sighed again. "Just now figuring that out, are you?" Dr. Brackett asked with an infectous smile.

"Lay off, would you?" Johnny asked in annoyance. "I've got enough trouble on my hands with everybody thinking that I killed Jack on purpose. In fact, I didn't kill him at all. He was holding the gun at the time and he was the one who pulled the trigger. Therefore, I had no part in it, except for the fact that I tried to get it away from him. Even if he had lived, the odds would be stacked against him, taken the fact that he broke into my house, threatened me with a gun and plus he shot me. Perhaps he's better off dead."

"Is that what happened?" Dr. Brackett asked, looking up with a frown.

"I just really don't understand what's going on." Roy complained, "First you say that you can't tell me what happened, not in front of Dix and Dr. Brackett at least, and then you go off by blabbing about what really happened. Are there bees in your brain or something?" he asked his paramedic partner.

"I'm just still a little shocked about today's events, that's all. Besides, everybody knows that you can't have bees in your brain. That's physically impossible. Even for those who believe that your ear leads to your brain and that bugs and earwigs and what not, can crawl into your head and eat you. And anyway, it's stupid to ask somebody if they have bees in their brain. That's like admitting that you've fallen victim to Canadian folklore." Johnny explained matter-of-factly.

"Canadian folklore? What the heck is he talking about?" Dixie demanded.

"Well, isn't it the Canadians scientists that introduced the lie that the opening in your ear really leads to your brain? After that, the German geniuses came up with the idea of scaring children with the tale of how bugs will crawl into your ears and lay eggs in your brain if you evesdrop on people." Jonny asked innocently, the pain-killer clearly having it's effect on him.

"Um, are you sure that your severe loss of blood hasn't altered the way you're thinking?" Roy asked, "And, I'd really wish you'd tell me what exactly happened with that weirdo named Jack! Who's Jack and is he the one that shot you? Why did he shoot you? Where were you the time that he shot you? Was there some further conflict that you can't tell me about?"

"Stop asking so many questions. You're starting to sound like that dumb police officer who kept asking me the same questions over and over again when I was in the ambulance, bleeding to death." Johnny retorted. Roy cringed.

"Why do I even bother with you? It's no wonder that your dad left the family, having you for a son, I mean really." he snapped.

"Okay, now you're just being mean." Johnny said bluntly. "Nurse! Get this man out of here, he's obstructing my view of the ear-infection chart." Roy waved him off and stormed out of the treatment room.

"I know how Roy feels." Dixie muttered. Dr. Brackett suddenly stood up straight and peeled off his latex gloves.

"Alright, you're all mended. In about three days, we'll remove the stitches." he sighed casually. Johnny looked at his neatly mended arm and nodded his approval.

"Thanks. I couldn't have sewn my own trousers back together that well. Thanks. But, are you sure that the stitches should be removed so soon? I think deep wounds need more than three days to heal."

"Whatever you think best, taken the fact that I know that whatever I suggest, you won't do." Dr. Brackett grunted.

"Well, see you later. I'm off to the police station to sign the reports on what happened. I couldn't do it before because I'm a not a lefty." Johnny said as he struggled to pull on his shirt with an IV jabbed in his arm.

Dr. Brackett shoved Johnny back down on the treatment table with a mild expression.

"You're not going anywhere. Let the police come to you. You have an IV stuck in you and you also have to stay here and rest up so you can heal faster. The best thing for you is to have a sling on that arm and sit still." he said firmly.

"But doc, I've got things to do!" Johnny argued, thinking about Alf, who snuck back to his house before the police had arrived, and about Donna, who was in a mental wreck at the police station. "I'll call downtown and ask them to send one of the officers handling the report to come here and have you sign it. If you have any other priorites, I'm sure that they can wait." Dr. Brackett replied, tossing a hospital gown on Johnny's lap.

"Do I really need this? I mean, it's just my arm. I'm still fully operational, as it were." he said flatly. "Fine. Do it your way. I honestly don't care. If you want to be a stubborn cuss, I have no place to stop you." Dr. Brackett replied.

"Well, look at it this way," Alf started, peeling an orange on Johnny's couch while watching Stomach Pump, "It could've been a lot worse. You could've been killed and Jack could've taken me to the authorities." he said loudly. Johnny was sitting next to Alf on the couch, staring blankly at the wall; it had been two weeks after Jack had been killed.

"I don't know if Jack's death was my fault or his. I feel so messed up." Johnny said sadly.

Alf snorted and threw an orange peel on Johnny's lap.

"I'm telling you," Alf complained, "Walmart has the crummiest fresh fruit." Johnny just grunted in reply.

"It's like, the day you buy it, it's nice. Then, when you get it home, it's gooey and disgusting." Alf continued, gesturing with his freshly peeled orange.

"You want a bite?" he asked. Johnny cringed.

"Oh, why not?" he murmured, snatching the orange with his good hand and taking a bite out of it. His other arm was in a sling and Alf was looking at it curiously.

"I bet that your wound will heal in no time." he said proudly.

Johnny shrugged. "Maybe so, but my conscience won't. I'll still feel like I have Jack's blood on my hands. I visted Donna at her house and she actually talked to me. _Reluctantly_."

Alf made a face. "I guess Jack's funeral really put her in a slump and she still feels like his death is all your fault and that you're a stupid murderer who doesn't deserve to be talked to, which I partly agree with." the alien explained. Johnny tossed the orange back to Alf and rested his head on the arm of the couch.

"Why do you have to put me down all the time?" he moaned.

"Well, someone's gotta do it." Alf said matter-of-factly. Johnny shook his head in frustration and stood up.

"Where's the DeLorean?" he demanded suddenly. Alf raised his eyebrows.

"Sick of me already?" he asked. Johnny scoffed. "I was sick of you the moment I met you." he snapped. Alf rolled his eyes.

"Now he lets on to me that he really hates me." the alien said jokingly.

"I need to know where the heck that car is. I can't stand another moment of you being in my life!" Johnny exclaimed gesturing with his good hand.

"It's your fault that Jack is dead and that people think I'm crazy! I want to get you back to the eighties so I can live my life as a normal man named John Gage. That's all I really want." he pleaded, kneeling down in front of Alf, his voice dropping to a whisper. Alf laughed.

"All you had to do was ask." Alf said nonchalantly. Johnny went slack-jawed. All he had to do was ask. That was nice. All he had to do was _ask. _Wonderful.

"Well, then find that DeLorean!" he shouted. Alf nodded.

"I must drink a certain beverage first and then utter the magic words. After that, I must fall asleep with the keys to the car under my pillow. Then, I will dream of the car and where it's parked." the alien explained mysteriously. Johnny screwed up his nose.

"You're putting me on, right?" he asked.

"You're good at this game." Alf said, nodding his approval. He then got up and pulled the keys to the DeLorean out from underneath the couch.

"That was a really dumb place to put them." Johnny scorned.

Alf paid no attention. "Now, if my calculations are correct, I parked the car somewhere on Brant Street. Like, I think…by a warehouse." the alien trailed off. Johnny grabbed the keys to his Barracuda and the keys to the DeLorean and ran out the door.

"Hurry up, I think I know which warehouse you're talking about." the paramedic said excitedly. Alf waddled after him and hopped in the passenger's seat of Johnny's car.

Johnny tried as best he could to control the car, but that's kind of hard when you're not a lefty and your other other arm is in a sling.

He maneuvered the car through thin traffic in the dark of the night and pulled onto Brant Street. The entire street looked rather shabby. As though no one had dared step foot there in a long time. Johnny cautiously drove down the street, looking back and forth for a warehouse. He suddenly spotted it, it's sillouette standing out against the moon. Alf shuddered.

"Wow. I chose a lousy place to land." the alien muttered.

Johnny nodded subconsciously and pulled up to the chain-link fence surrounding the warehouse. Alf got out and followed him. Johnny craned his neck to see the barbed wire on top of the tall fence.

"It's gonna be a leap of faith. Or guts, if you like." he joked.

Alf looked at him with a serious face and Johnny's smile faded. He grunted to break the silence and took his coat off.

Johnny walked backwards a few paces and ran forward. He threw the coat up over the fence. The coat landed, spread out over the barbed wire. Johnny rubbed his hands together and prepared to tackle the fence. He jumped up and grabbed as high as he could. Johnny soon got over the fence and landed on the other side.

"Your turn." he said with a grin.

Alf frowned. "How am I supposed to shimmy up over there like a monkey if I have feet like an elephant?" the alien protested, gesturing towards his feet. Once again, Johnny's smile faded.

"I'll find something to cut the fence." he said determinedly. Johnny scouted around the barren, but overgrown parking lot and found a pair of rusty wire-cutters.

"Better than nothing." he mumbled. Soon, the fence was cut and Alf had slipped through. "Let's look around for the DeLorean." Johnny said, hugging himself against the cold winds that blew at him, making him shudder. He heard Alf's excited voice over the quiet and ran over to him.

"I found it!" Alf exclaimed happily. Johnny ran over to Alf, who was standing on the dark side of the warehouse and stopped when he saw the space-age-looking car. Alf grabbed the keys out of Johnny's pocket and ran over to the driver's door. He unlocked it and the door slowly popped up like wings on a bird.

"That's out of sight!" Johnny gasped, running his hand across the hood.

Alf got in through the driver's side and slid over to the passenger's seat. Johnny got in next to him and marveled at all the complicated controls. He flicked a green pine tree air-freshner hanging from the rear-view mirror and chuckled. Alf pressed a button on the dash and the driver's door closed with a thud. Johnny yelped with surprise and slowly relaxed.

"How do I start this thing up?" he asked. Alf handed him the keys.

"It's not a 72' Plymouth Barracuda, but it's a pretty wild ride anyway." the alien said solemnly. Johnny looked at Alf nervously and grabbed the keys out of his furry paw. Johnny took in a deep breath and put the key in the ignition. He slowly turned it and jumped when the radio came on, blaring a loud song. Alf's face lit up and he started bobbing his head to Working for the Weekend.

"I love this song!" he said excitedly.

Johnny scrambled his hand across the dash, looking for a way to shut the radio off. He found something and pressed it. The radio shut off and Alf grunted.

"I sure hope that you know how to use this thing." Johnny said firmly. Alf nodded.

"All that you need to do is enter in where you want to go. The time, the date and the exact location." the alien explained. Johnny's eyes went round.

"I'm gonna have you do that." he said, his voice fluttering. Alf found the controls and did exactly as he was told. "October Twenty-Eighth, Nineteen-eighty-six, Los Angeles, California, U.S.A., Willie and Kate Tanner residence." Alf said seriously as he typed it in. Johnny watched carefully, to make sure Alf was doing it right and not transporting them to some time in the eighteen-sixties.

"Now hurry up and get this thing up to eighty-eight miles per hour!" Alf commanded. Johnny nodded quickly and drove the car right through the fence surrounding the warehouse and skidded onto Brant Street.

"Are you sure about this?" Johnny asked shakily. Alf nodded impatiently.

"Yes!" he hissed. Johnny put the gas petal to the floor and stiffened as the spedometer reached seventy, then seventy-five, eighty, eighty-two, eighty-four, eighty-six…..eighty-eight! Soon, everything changed and was indescribable as the view out the windsheild became a blur. Alf shouted with delight and Johnny stood still, scared to death. Suddenly, the car jerked wildly as it crashed into something. Johnny's head hit the steering wheel and Alf flew forward. The two looked out the windsheild and saw that the car had crashed into some shrubs. Johnny cursed under his breath and opened the driver's door. Alf slid out behind him. A neighbor to the Tanners was watering her flowers and dropped the hose when she took in the incredible scene. Her mouth was gaping open as she watched a paramedic and what looked like a cross between an anteater and a kangaroo strut by. Johnny saluted to her and Alf did the same. The woman screamed and ran into her house, shouting,

"Trevor! Trevor! There's a creature outside and a magical car and our shrubs and-" her voice was cut off by another one, scorning her.

"Shut up, Raquel!"

Alf snorted and took the lead. Johnny followed behind him.

"I didn't think it would be this simple." Johnny said doubtfully. Alf looked up at him as he reached the Tanners' front door. After everything Johnny had endured within the past month, he found himself in a strange sense of calm. The kind of feeling you get when you've seen everything that could ever be seen. This whole ordeal didn't surprise or shock him one bit.

"You'll have a lot of explaining to do." Alf said in a low voice as he reached up and hit the doorbell. Johnny waited, his heart racing as he waited for someone to answer the door. He hadn't even thought about what he was going to say. He felt like he was entering a confessional without even thinking about what he was supposed to confess. Totally unprepared was the correct term.

Suddenly, the door opened and standing there, was a little eight year-old boy with reddish brown hair. His freckled face lit up when he saw Alf. The boy screamed with delight, "ALF!" he leaped forward and hugged the alien. Several more voices sounded from inside the house and the sound of approaching footsteps grew louder.

"Alf? What about Alf?" a female voice asked.

"Did Alf come back?" another girlish voice asked.

"Alf? I don't belive it!" A deep voice decreed.

Johnny watched Alf's family stream to the front door and overwhelm the alien with hugs and tears.

"We thought you were never coming back!" the girl said through tears.

"Mom said that you probably got hit by a car." the little boy said simply. Alf looked up at the boy's mother. She grunted uncomfortably.

"Brian, let's not get carried away." she said in a stern voice.

"Alf, where in blue blazes have you been?" the father asked, standing up straight. Alf looked at them and shrugged.

"Oh, around." the alien replied. "You were gone so long, we thought that you… that you had been killed." the mother choked out. The daughter looked up and noticed Johnny standing behind Alf, watching the happy reunion.

"Um, did you….did you…um, find Alf?" she asked, wincing at her own words. Johnny smiled a little bit.

"You could say that, yes." he replied. Suddenly, all of the family members were staring with horror-stricken faces at Johnny. They all looked speechless.

"Don't worry." Johnny assured calmly, "You're secret is safe with me."

All the Tanners sighed in relief.

"Come in." the father said happily. Johnny came in and didn't know what to say.

"What's your name?" the daughter asked.

"John Gage. I'm a fireman-paramedic." Johnny replied.

"Oh, and _you_ found Alf?" the mother asked. "Well, Alf kind of found me. But, only me and a couple other people know about him. I made them swear a path to secrecy." Johnny answered with a chuckle.

"Well, let me introduce you to my family," the father started, "I'm Willie Tanner and this is my wife Kate." he said, putting his arm around his wife.

"And this is our daughter, Lynn and our son, Brian." Mr. Tanner concluded.

"Pleasure to meet you." Johnny said, extending his good hand to shake Mr. Tanner's hand.

"Are you really a fireman?" Brian asked.

"Yes. I am." Johnny replied, amused by the boy's fascination with him.

"Yes, Johnny-baby here, has been good to me." Alf said, patting Johnny on his arm.

Mrs. Tanner noticed that Johnny's right arm was in a sling and she pointed at it.

"Um….I hope Alf didn't do that." she said worriedly. Johnny looked down at his arm and chuckled. "Well…in a way…yes he did. Just a gunshot wound, nothing serious." he replied. He flinched when he realized how stupid that sounded. Mr. And Mrs. Tanner both gasped.

"Alf!" they said scornfully. Alf looked up at them. "What?" he asked.

"I hope he didn't damage anything…besides you?" Mr. Tanner questioned nervously. Johnny shrugged.

"Not really. But…" he thought better of what he was going to say and left it at "not really". The Tanners let out out a sighs of relief.

"If he did….I would gladly pay for the damages." Mr. Tanner offered, pulling out his wallet. Johnny shook his head.

"You don't have to do that," he said, "It was just one week of groceries. I don't really eat that much anyway." Mr. Tanner went slack-jawed and looked at Alf.

"Please, I insist." he said. Johnny sighed.

"Well, okay." Johnny agreed, taking the twenty that was offered to him.

"Hey, you should join us for dinner and tell us about what happened with Alf." Lynn suggested. Brian nodded excitedly.

"Can he stay for dinner? Please, Mom?" Brian begged. Mrs. Tanner looked down at her son, who was tugging at her pantleg.

"Of course he can." she replied.

Mr. Tanner straightened out his glasses. "Well Mr. Gage, I sure hope you like fried chicken, because that's what we're having." he said with a laugh.

"Just try to keep _me_ away from fried chicken!" Johnny joked. "I sure hope it's better than what they serve at the fire station!" soon,everyone was seated at the supper table, eating and talking excitedly about Alf. Johnny told the Tanners everything about Alf's antics, but left the part out about time-traveling. It was too dangerous for them to know. Johnny was careful about how much he explained, because according to Mrs. Tanner, Alf had only been gone for four days, but for Johnny, Alf had been with him for a little more than a month. Time seemed to work in funny ways. After everyone was done eating, Johnny thanked them for the food and stood up.

"Leaving so soon?" Mrs. Tanner asked in a surprised voice.

Johnny sighed. "Well, I have to leave, but first, I have to say goodbye to Alf." he said. Alf got up from his seat at the table and walked over to Johnny and looked up at him. After everything they had been through, Johnny had never thought that he would ever be sad to leave Alf. It was almost heart-wrenching. Johnny knelt down and hugged Alf, taking the alien by surprise. He whispered in his ear, "It was fun, Alf." Alf nodded and said back, "It was interesting, Johnny-baby." Johnny stood up and blinked back a tear. He faked a smile and nodded.

"I'm going to miss you." he said. "Well, where exactly are you going?" Mr. Tanner asked.

"I'm going away. Back to my fire station. Y'see, I'm being transferred to somewhere in Colorado," he lied, "And I'm never going to be able to see any of you again. This is the last time I'll be able to talk to Alf. The fire station seems like almost twelve years away." Johnny replied softly. He brightened a little and looked at Alf.

"I hope you stay out of trouble, you darned son of a gun." Johnny teased. Alf shrugged. "I hope you find 'the one'." the alien replied.

"Kate, Willie." Johnny said with a nod. "Lynn, Brian; I'm glad to have brought Alf back. He's one heckuva an alien and don't you forget it." the Tanners smiled back.

"Oh, we know." Mr. Tanner said assuredly.

"We can't thank you enough for bringing him back to us. I don't think we ever imagined what it would be like without him. It was awful." Mrs. Tanner said. Mr. Tanner nodded in agreement. "Yes, Thank you." Johnny nodded and gave one last smile at Alf. He then turned and walked outside to the DeLorean. Once he was in the car, Johnny just sat still, thinking about everything that had happened in the last month. All the shock, all the anger, all the despair, all the heartbreak. But it all seemed worth it, just seeing the looks on the Tanners' faces when they were reunited with Alf. Johnny pushed away his sappy thoughts and started up the car. He typed in the date it was when he had left his own reality. Soon, he was flashed back to the past. Johnny got out of the DeLorean, back to the warehouse.

Suddenly, it hit him. He had to get rid of that DeLorean. Johnny knew exactly what he had to do. That DeLorean had to be returned to it's rightful owner. Johnny typed in the date he wanted and got back in the car. Once he had sped it up to eighty-eight miles per hour, he opened the hatch. He was suddenly scared of what he had to do. Johnny jumped out and flew down on the hard pavement. He gasped when the breath was knocked out of him. All that he saw was the DeLorean disappearing in a flash of white light and a trail of flames left on the road as he passed out.

Meanwhile, Marty McFly was sitting on the hood of a car in a parking lot, resting his chin on his cupped hands. He sighed once more and cursed under his breath; his time-traveling DeLorean had been stolen right out from under his nose. Suddenly, a flash of white light came from right next to the car he was sitting on. He saw a blur of gray as a car sped by, leaving a trail of flames behind it. It crashed into another car in the lot and Marty jumped up excitedly. He ran over to the car, his heart racing with excitement when he realized that it was his DeLorean.

"I don't believe it!" he declared happily. "Thank goodness she's back!"

"So, he's where he belongs?" Donna asked, holding Johnny's hand as she walked out of the hospital with him. Johnny couldn't help feeling thankful that Donna had forgiven him for Jack's accidental death. It was like everything was back to normal. Johnny's anger at her betraying him was now just a fading echo.

Roy was following them, his hands in his pockets. Dixie and Dr. Brackett were in tow as well.

"I still think that he was a cuss." Roy muttered. Johnny shrugged.

"Well, Alf's happy with his family. I never could have kept him from what he wanted most." he replied slowly. Donna nodded. "You did the right thing."

"I still don't know why you didn't tell us about this whole thing sooner." Dr. Brackett said angrily, folding up his stethoscope and putting it in the pocket of his lab coat.

"We could've helped you." Dixie scorned, crossing her arms.

"I didn't want to tell you about Alf, the car or Jack or anything, just because I was sick of explaining it. I was also afraid of how might've taken it." Johnny joked. Dixie and Dr. Brackett rolled their eyes.

"You really banged yourself up when fell out of the DeLorean." Roy chimed in. Johnny looked back at him.

"I had to do it. It was too dangerous to keep around." he said. Roy raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, but how do you know that that McFly kid won't abuse it's power?" he demanded. Johnny stopped and rubbed a large cut on his cheek.

"I don't know. Life's just a test of faith that's periodically faltered throughout my life, but never totally quit. I can't be sure that he won't use it for evil, but I can't be sure that he will. I just trust that it is where it belongs." Johnny said quietly. "How did you know which coordinates to enter in to get it back to McFly?" Dr. Brackett asked.

Johnny looked back at him.

"During supper at the Tanners' house, Alf slid a piece of paper with the coordinates on it, into my hand underneath the table. He knew as well as I did what had be done." Johnny explained. Dixie shook her head. "I just feel so left out of everything!" she complained.

"Don't worry Dix, I know how you feel," Dr. Brackett agreed, "But, if I had known that that 'mascot' was actually an alien, I would've fainted." Johnny grinned. "That's why I didn't tell you." Donna smiled and grabbed Johnny's good hand.

"If you're done with your lecture, I think that we should get something to eat. There's a hotdog stand across the street, over there." she said. Johnny smiled back at her.

"If you're really that hungry." he said, pulling a twenty dollar bill out of his pocket.

Donna caught a glimpse of it and snagged it from him.

"Johnny, this is the nineteen-eighty-six issue!" she exclaimed, "It must be the one that you said Mr. Tanner gave to you!" "What?" Roy asked, pushing his way in between them and marveling at the bill. Dixie and Dr. Brackett craned their necks to see and widened their eyes. "Wow." they said in unison. Johnny raised an eyebrow and grinned.

"Think that he'll notice?" he asked, gesturing his head towards the man tending the hotdog stand. "I don't know." Donna said. Johnny grabbed her hand again.

"There's only one way to find out." Johnny said, still grinning as he walked over with her to the hotdog stand.

THE END.

You're probably wondering what I'm going to do next, but honestly, I didn't think I'd make it this far.


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